In this back-to-school season

Another article to make you cry, via a friend on facebook.

Beverly Beckham: I was the sun, the kids were my planet

Though I have a terrible memory, I distinctly remember a wedding we attended when I was pregnant with Ellen. We had recently learned we were having a girl and my husband's darling cousin was getting married ... watching my husband's uncle walk his daughter down the aisle just about did us in.

His uncle's toast at the reception has stuck with me ... something that their OB told them the day their daughter was born ... a mother and father's job is to raise a child to leave them. Give them all the skills and tools they will need for life, so they can go out on their own. Yes, they'll be back now and then, but if you are really good at your job, they won't need you anymore. Not for the big stuff, anyway. Sniff, sniff.

Could this be true?
Yes, it could.

I think about it often. Am I giving Ellen the tools she needs to be successful and independent and happy and generous and kind and, and, and, and ...

It's a lot, isn't it??

The second part of his toast, which I think is just as important, is that it is also your job to maintain your relationship with your spouse. For someday, you will find your house empty of children and you will be left only with each other. You better like each other! :)

So, date night tonight and child-rearing tomorrow. Care to join me?

Free! Parenting Classes!

What, you don't need them?

I do.

From our friends at Rookie Moms -

Webinar classes next Tuesday, August 30th, at 2pm and 9pm eastern time.

I'll see if I can tie my child up because she won't be napping or sleeping and maybe I can attend. (See? I need them.)

Get it together

I really can't get my shit together these days, so sorry about that.

I did come across these two articles / blog posts and thought they were well written and/or thought provoking. Maybe you will think so, too?

I found this first one via Dash and Bella, which is a great food/cooking blog with kiddos. This gal seriously does crazy amazing things with her kids. This article is about pot smoking and Disney World, which are generally two things I know nothing about, though I laughed out loud several times at the (lengthy) article late last night, which does not come easy at the end of a long day. I really like the author's style of writing.
You Blow my Mind. Hey Mickey!

The second post is more typical Mom-fare from our friends at Rookie Moms. It was a link to an old post about Victory Babies. I had never heard the term, but it was interesting to read - and the comments, too. From time to time I read about moms who feel like they were "cheated" when their first birth didn't go exactly as planned and they have a nagging to desire to make it right the next time. My first delivery was pretty much the exact opposite of what I envisioned, and scary to boot, but ended in a wonderful miracle and I have zero-zilch-nada regrets about the whole thing. And, truthfully, I would sign up to do it again tomorrow.

Do you have a secret or not-so-secret desire for a victory baby?

We do have some things lurking in toddler land at our house, such as poor sleeping, thinking about dropping the nap?, transitioning to big girl bed and big girl room, moving up to the Balloons room at school, general nose-turning-up-at-vegetables - you know - all the fun stuff!

Someday I'll fill you in on all the details.

Probably.
Definitely.
Maybe.

Thought provoking

I came across an interesting article today about how we talk to girls.

A Cup of Jo is a blog that I don't read frequently, but other blogs I read link to her content all the time. She had this nice post Motherhood Mondays: How to talk to little girls. She references an article by Lisa Bloom in The Huffington Post by the same title.

I guess I find that I am always squealing over little girls' hair and clothes and shoes because they are so stinkin' cute (!), but I sure would rather engage their brains.

Note to self: try harder.

You, too?

Uncomfortable topic?

So, here's one for you ... anyone got any great tips on talking to a toddler about death?

Ellen had a nice man who volunteered in her classroom at school and read books several days a week for over a year. I never met him, but she always talked about him fondly. Unbeknownst to me, he had retired from his job when he found out he had cancer and decided to spend whatever time he had left doing things he enjoyed. It is just about the nicest, and saddest, story. I didn't know he was sick and he died recently.

Here is the sticky part for me ... Ellen didn't know he was sick, either. His family wanted to involve the children in his memorial service and asked for us to attend, which was very nice, yet also very uncomfortable for me. I felt I needed to have some conversation with Ellen about what happened before going, but I also felt that we shouldn't not go just because it made me uncomfortable.

We aren't really a religious family and I feel like I don't have a good framework for discussing death in terms she might understand. She also currently has a total obsession with doctors and doctors offices and the things that happen there. I don't want her to be fearful of getting sick and not getting better.

Turns out we couldn't go to the service for another reason, but I still think I need to address this.

Help?

Vacation

We are not on vacation. In fact, it's like we are doing the exact opposite of vacation.

Nonetheless, maybe you are on vacation? (If so, have a drink for me, but don't send a postcard. We're moving. And I'd be jealous.)

I came across this and it seemed like a good tip to file away for the future. Our first roadtrip with a toddler could be summed up with the word "disaster". Next time (if there is a next time?) maybe something like this would work ...

Tips for Road Trip with Kids by 320*Sycamore

For your list

I found this list of great children's picture books over at Design Mom. We have read a lot of them, but certainly not all.

I'm going to print the list and add it to our library bag ... I find that I'm always wanting to seek out good books, but I never have a list, so I resort to choosing by covers. Sometimes this works, sometimes not (i.e. the book we brought home about dying dogs).

Then, I am also usually chasing Ellen through the chapter book section as she pulls books off the shelf and says, "I big now, Momma. I read this book. I big. I big like you."

Here ya' go - happy library-check-outing!
Design Mom's Top 50 Picture Books

This will tug at your heart a little

We have a sweetie sweet sweet new little niece who is the tiniest human being I've ever held. We had a great family get-together and it was fun and shocking to see this tiny new being amongst the now huge-appearing cousins. Where has the time gone?

I find that mothering (and fathering, I spose, though I won't speak for them) is such a balance of hurry-up-let's-get-going and stop-right-there-and-let-me-burn-this-on-my-brain-forever.

Not to get all granola on you, but this guest post by Tara Thayer at Soule Mama says it much better than I can ...

Soulful Mothering

Some follow-up

I've been meaning to post about one of our favorite baby gear items that has made a re-appearance in our house. The Boppy!

I expressed my Boppy love previously - it was the perfect nursing accessory for us. Then after Ells was weaned, it made its way to the linen closet, never to be heard from again. Ellen pulled it out a few months ago - she had seen her baby cousin use it and wanted to get it out for her to play with. Then she asked to put it in her crib. Then I realized it is the perfect pillow!

I guess some toddlers like pillows and some don't, but she really loves her Boppy pillow. And, what's not to love? It's kind of like a baby version of those body pillows. Washable cover. Done. She was riding it around as a horse last night, too - the fun never ends.

Also, switching gears, some Dentist follow-up. I posted a few months ago about our prep for the first visit. I just wanted to say that it was wildly successful! Ellen was a great patient, so compliant, and not a peep or a tear. She even talked to the dentist about germs and sugar and plaque, for heaven's sake! We watched the Bucky the Beaver DVD no fewer than 37 times and it was sad to return it to the library. Almost 2 months later she is STILL talking about the dentist and she likes to pretend play dentist quite a bit. She still fights us on brushing at bedtime, but I'll take it!

Lucky

I'm probably late to the game on this, but just came across this nice article for Father's Day.

A Father's Day Wish: Dads, Wake the Hell Up!

For me, it was just a good reminder how lucky I am to have a spouse that fully participates in our daughter's life. I am also super lucky to have come from a household with a Dad that fully participated in my life. It's pretty easy to take those things for granted and some reminding is helpful every now and then.

I hope you can count yourself in the lucky category, too.

A jellybean?

Ellen asks for a jellybean ....

What for? I say

"For the manners"

What manners?

"Please and thank you"

Well, it's a start, I guess.

I saved this article from Parents magazine this Spring on "25 Manners Every Kid Needs by Age 9" - I think I have some work to do.

Cute clothes!

I'm on a spending hiatus, but recently discovered that I love Olive Juice Kids clothes (much to the chagrin of my checkbook). I bought some on Gilt during a sale a month or so ago and the quality is great and the styles are so classic.

Gilt is having another sale today!
If you aren't a member, you can use my link: http://www.gilt.com/invite/mollylund

Happy shopping!

Ugh, slacking

Well, let's just really call it a summer hiatus.

All of a sudden I feel like I can't get anything accomplished? You, too? It doesn't help that my list of things to accomplish keeps getting longer, but I do love me some task-scratch-offing.

Here is one thing on the list: a Mom-friendly swimsuit

Got a good source for me?

I do have a cute one piece from J. Crew that I got before our Hawaii trip (almost 2 years ago - whaaa), but it really isn't toddler-chasing, swim-lesson-appropriate.

I think I need a 2 piece, as to avoid shimmying out of a wet one piece if I have to pee whilst wrangling a slippery child. The top piece, though, needs to be long enough to cover up the "mom" part.

I keep trying to get to Land's End to try on their suits (nothing says Mom like Land's End). I love the J Crew suits, but not sure that my budget can justify that.

Help a momma out!

Girls and boys

A few quick "Girl" and "Boy" things for your Friday ...

I realized we have about enough dresses for Ellen to wear a different one each day this summer! She hasn't worn many dresses in the past, mostly because they got in her way when she was a crawler and a new walker, and then it wasn't dress season. Now, though, she is obsessed with things that "tirl" (twirl). She gets up, goes potty, then puts on undies and a skirt or dress each day. Today she had to feel the fabric of each one to see if it passed muster (so help me God).

Here's my tip #1 though: I bought quite a few dresses last summer on sale for this summer. I just bought 2T because I thought they would be plenty big, and now I think she'll be out of them by mid-summer. She is a shorty with short arms, but dresses are perfect for her and the size is more forgiving - next time I'll remember to size up.

Tip #2 (or really, need a tip #2) - I've realized that big girl dresses don't come with bloomers, which annoys me so much. For an active little girl, I hate to have her undies showing when she is playing. It is surprisingly hard to find bloomers for bigger girls that might actually match the dress she is wearing. I swear I had read about some boy-short type product for little girls called something like "I see London, I see Francies", but I can't find it with the Googling. Gah. Any suggestions?

And, because I don't know anything about boys, I don't have any good tips, but I do have a good party suggestion. Well, a good suggestion for someone who isn't crazy OCD like me. Yet again, it's from Ashley at Under the Sycamore - Mad Run birthday party. It's a huge, muddy obstacle course for boys! Send me some pictures of you hosting this party and cleaning up afterwards!

Also, courtesy of Ashley at Under the Sycamore, some fun summer ideas for kids:
Meg's Craft Thursday Projects
Martha's 60 days of Summer for kids
Wondertime's 12 activities for kids
Digital Reflections 100 free activities to do with kids this summer

And, on a related note, it's summer already? When did that happen?