Have Baby, Will Travel - the infant edition

Welp. We're home from my girls (plus one breastfed baby) weekend. Though there were quite a few pitfalls, the excellent catching-up-with-friends times resulted in a net success over all.

I had to be hands free, so I looked much like a sherpa climbing a mountain with someone's gear: Baby in Bjorn, backpack full of baby essentials, diaper bag with carry on items that weren't quite as essential, and one roller bag stuffed to the gills. All of this for what ended up being 3 nights and 2 full days. I am a chronic over-packer and, while I can reduce my own stuff to mostly essentials, there are just a lot of baby contingencies. (AND my friends brought a car seat, pack n'play and stroller. Can you even imagine if they didn't? Guess G wouldn't have gone on vaca).

I picked up Georgia from daycare on the day before our trip and her sweet teacher, who can cuddle babies with the best of them but speaks relatively limited English, greeted me with a, "Oh, sweetie girl Georgia. Lots of diarrhea." AWESOME. This prompted some texts with her regular teacher to get some clarity on the actual poop situation that day. Again, AWESOME. Miss G has been blowing out her diapers everyday - I think due to new diapers - so we reverted to the good ol' Pampers Swaddlers for the trip, a size bigger, and she was fine all weekend. Phew.

I did read a tip about traveling with baby that I thought was helpful ... I packed 4 quart-size ziploc bags with a diaper and disposable changing pad in each, plus accessible wipes. This allowed for one quick grab when it was time to change a diaper (plus a bag to dispose it in) instead of shuffling all through the baby bag. I packed lots of sanitizer wipes and such but the reality is that Georgia isn't really touching anything and I didn't have any free hands once on the plane to wipe things down. Oh well.

Otherwise the essential carry-on bag had a change of clothes for G, a few burp cloths (she is a spitty baby), one quiet-ish toy, dipes/wipes, a bottle of milk with a gel freezer pack in a neoprene wine cooler bag, a bottle of water for me, and my phone/wallet/chapstick. The non-essential carry-on bag had a change of clothes for me and an extra outfit for G, a few more dipes, medicine, breast pump and parts, nursing cover and light blanket for emergency feedings (I'm not a public nurser). My system worked pretty well - stashed the essential bag in front of my seat, non-essential overhead with Bjorn. You can't wear a baby in a Bjorn for take-off or landing, so might as well not use it at all. I also grabbed an extra cup at Starbucks so I could give it to the flight attendant with the bottle to add some warm water. Worked great.

Not much to add other than the expected difficulty napping in a strange place and strange bed. I called ahead to inquire about an iPod dock for white noise, but ended up using a fan in our room and it was perfect (we all stayed in a rented house). Georgia just really only sleeps well at home, which is good for 95% of our life. 

Oh, and a word about pumping. I took a bottle of milk with us on the plane, but didn't really have a way to bring more milk. I had arranged for a sitter for Friday night and Saturday afternoon and all of a sudden it got kind of stressful to make sure I was pumping enough to have bottles for her when I left. I was pumping after each feeding and before bed and barely had enough. I'm not sure how I would have remedied this as Georgia hasn't ever had formula, but I might have packed an emergency single serving or two, just in case.

The trip stress was mostly related to flight cancellations / stuck jetways / delays and layovers in airports. Not much you can do to control that, though it is 10X more stressful with a baby. We were initially flying American who specifically said I didn't need any identification documents for Georgia, though we switched to Southwest at the last minute and they require a birth certificate or immunization record. I never ordered a copy of G's birth certificate (terrible!), so I fortunately had access to her shot record. Plan ahead on that one. Also, Southwest was great so I could board with "family boarding" and get an aisle seat. Seems to me that aisle is best if traveling alone with a small child for easy in and out. I think a window is great with a young toddler and/or if you are flying with another adult.

I took a picture with my iPhone of G in the airport and a quick pic the morning we left just to document that she was there, but otherwise no time/hands for pictures. Here are a few non-travel-related kid/media things I've come across lately:
The Kids Should See This - videos that kids will love, but not specifically made for kids
The Stories Objects Hold at Sesame Ellis 
And, as she links to, Kids Were Here
And an inspiring photo blog of kid pictures - You Are My Wild

At it again ...

I have little of consequence to report; just been the typical routine around here. I'm the sick one this time and - newsflash - your kids are happy to bring home germs AND they don't give two shits that you are sick. I'm wearing my OLD glasses this weekend because I have pinkeye and Georgia can't seem to figure out who I am. Ellen, on the other hand, thinks I look like a newscaster.

I moved Georgia to a four schedule, which is really so great. I remember dreaming of this when I was up so frequently with her during the night when she was a newborn. Following the trend, I worried about it much less this go round ... just casually moved her evening feedings closer together and added some more milk to her school bottles, then just dropped a feeding and she was fine. No biggie. I think she is seriously the most flexible child of all times. I kept pumping before I went to bed to maintain a 5th "feeding", but wasn't getting much milk for the effort. I had such a crazy milk supply with Ellen that my benchmark is skewed and I feel like I don't have enough, yet I'm still putting a little milk in the freezer at the end of each week. I decided to stop with the pumping on most nights and we'll see how it goes.

Her napping is generally quite good. Not at school, mind you, but her Thursdays and Fridays are usually great when she is home. Then Saturdays and Sundays are a little less predictable because she is well-rested, then the process starts all over. The new 4-hour schedule has messed with our dinnertime a bit, as she is zombie-like after school and requires a lot of attention right when we need to get dinner on the table. When Ellen was a baby, I would just put her down and then Erik and I would eat later. Now, we need to feed Ellen and then start the bedtime charade, so there is no time to eat later. Oh well - just another transition. When she is really sitting up and eating some finger foods in a few months, I think we'll be good.

Speaking of finger foods - I'm flying with Georgia next week solo on a trip to visit my girlfriends. I've flown with Ellen solo, but always had food and toys to keep her entertained. Not this time ... send your happy-flying-baby vibes this way, s'il vous plait.

And, per usual, a few more things I've been reading. Do you like this and/or find it interesting?
The Ringya App via Cool Mom Tech - organize groups of school/sports contacts easily
Helicopter Parents are Everywhere, Except Where They're Needed Most - an interesting column on child and car seat safety in response to a viral kid video
A good response to the Victoria's Secret tween-undie scandal via Mom101 -  and, can I say, SOOO not looking forward to the teenage girl years
Why Suckable Fruit Sucks - interesting commentary on a generation of children who eat much of their food from pouches
Related, from Dinner: A Love Story - How to talk to your kids about healthy eating -  I like the "sometimes food" description
And another from them, Dinner: A Love Story - 100 Rules of Dinner

And, finally, I liked this column by Erin Loechner on being a first time mom and creating a baby registry. I have a similar feeling when I read back through early entries on this blog looking to see how I did things the first time. I hope it didn't come across as preachy and know-it-all, but maybe it did. It seems that way to me, at least, a lot of the time. I just think there is something about being a first-time parent and trying to figure it all out (as if it's even realistic to think you can) and for me it was  helpful to process things by writing. If anyone else benefited, even better. So ... thanks for "listening" back then. And still.

Some more stuff

Georgia is totally entering the stage of being distracted while eating, which means we are getting back to 'all hands on deck' for feedings. I bet she popped on and off about 25 times last night, just checking if I was still there. Yep, still here. Before she started with this, I came across a few snippets here and there I thought were worth sharing ...

Rage Against the Minivan: Let's Bring Holidays Down a Notch - I came across this on Facebook and completely agree. The holiday celebrating, and especially the situations requiring candy, are way way over the top. I admit I felt a twinge of guilt about not doing anything for St. Patrick's Day since it was on a weekend this year, then I quickly got over it. We didn't even wear green! We have had some big Easter gifts the past few years, mostly as compensation for a too-close birthday and Christmas, but this year will be much more low key. I finally wised up and got some little tiny toys / play food to go in the easter eggs instead of all candy. Coins are also especially motivating this year.

New York Times: The Stories that Bind Us - Interesting read about how children cope better if they feel that they know and are part of a family narrative. I think a daily family meal is a good time to share some of these things, though we really aren't there yet. We are still mostly in the "sit still and face your plate and stop talking so much" phase of family dinner. Also, on a related/unrelated note, Ellen's teachers tell me it is hysterical to watch her talk about food with her classmates. As I put on Facebook, she asked recently if they were having an arugula salad for lunch. She was inquiring last night about the differences between quinoa and polenta. Love my good little eater!

And, related to eating, Wall Street Journal: Food Allergy Advice for Kids, Don't Delay Peanuts, Eggs. I found the journal article this was based on (nerd) and talked it over with my pediatrician brother-in-law. I wasn't too hyper with this kind of thing with Ellen, but I probably did wait close to 12 months for those "target foods". I will introduce them earlier with Georgia, I think. I really don't think she is ready for solids yet - not showing interest, not sitting up really strongly - and it's a total pain in the ass to start on solids, if I'm being honest. I think we will do a little bit more of the "baby-led weaning" idea of feeding baby what the rest of the family is eating, as her dinner time will be the same as ours! I'm also kind of excited about the reusable pouches they have now - it's amazing how much has changed with baby feeding in just 4 years (most of which I think is a gimmick, actually, but there are a few handy inventions).

Gear, take two

It's probably quite obvious that I don't have much time to write here. Or, really, not much of use to write about! The novelty of being a first-time mom has worn off, so I feel that much of what we are up to is familiar. I tried to keep the new baby purchases to a minimum - even easier since we can re-use all the "girl" things, but there are a few new things I'm loving that I thought I would share.

I ordered this Baby Cargo Georgi Stroller Bag not long after we got home from the hospital. (Could the name be more perfect?) I got mine at Diapers.com, but seems that it is cheapest at Target right now. It is a good size and has plenty of pockets. Doesn't hold a ton of stuff (not as much as the backpack I used with Ellen), but works as a messenger-style purse and I think will be great on the MacLaren when we get to using it. I even saw that the gals at Ain't No Mom Jeans use it from time to time, so then I felt reasonably stylish. :)

This Conair Sound Therapy and Relaxation Clock Radio kills two birds with one stone - noise machine and clock for nursing. In Ellen's room we had a digital clock plus used our iPod and docking station for ocean noise (ridiculously expensive noise machine). This isn't the greatest clock ever, but is fine for the price.

The Nose Frida snot sucker is flat out amazing. Get it, along with extra filters.

I already told you that I like the Rumina Full Coverage pumping / nursing tank, but I continue to really like it. It has more support than my previous favorite tanks, the Gilligan O'Malley Target ones. I still like the Target ones for sleeping and hanging around the house - more comfy, and cheaper!

We added a few of these Halo Sleepsack Swaddles in cotton to our pile of swaddling items. Last time we used the Kiddopotamus SwaddleMe with good success, but I think this go-round their velcro was kind of worn out and Georgia could bust out of them pretty easily. I found that the cotton ones worked best - most stretchy and tight, but had to be washed frequently to keep their tightness. This sleepsack swaddle was kind of easy for Georgia to get out of in full swaddle mode, but the ability to swaddle one arm or no arms seemed to work great for us. We used it to wean from the swaddling with no issues. The newborn size is pretty short and she grew out of it rather quickly and isn't all that long of a baby, so now we use the small size.

This Fisher Price Cradle n' Swing was borrowed from a friend both times - different friends, same swing. It was a lifesaver both times. I guess you'll never know if your baby will like it, but it would have been a worthwhile investment. Hooray for generous friends! This version also plugs in, which is nice.

 And a few other things ...
- Some kind of bouncy chair, just very basic. We were gifted a MacLaren version that isn't made anymore, but it is similar to the Baby Bjorn Babysitter, just much less expensive. I just wanted a seat that would prop Georgia up while we were eating or whatever, and it has worked great for that purpose.We never had one with Ellen for some reason.
- Georgia practically lives in these Tea Collection Footies. They are a great weight for cold weather babies and wash and wear so well. I got several on major sale -they have great sales if you subscribe to their emails.
- I've commented on this before, but we opted to purchase a nebulizer machine through our pediatrician after Ellen needed it for the second time with a wheezing respiratory illness as a toddler. It has turned out to be so useful - we have albuterol on hand and can use it for both girls. We've unfortunately needed it a lot, but it saves us an urgent trip to the doctor on a weekend or whatever. So, if you need it once, buy one!
- Not to toot my own horn, but this blog has been so useful for me. I'm not saying it will be so useful for you, but the ability to look back at what I did with the first child has been great. I invariably find myself saying, "Ellen never did this!" (yes she did), or "how did we ever make this work?". It's so nice to see what we did. Not that Georgia is the same child, of course, but it's a good record. If you have your first child, I encourage you to take notes about those mundane things - it might come in handy!

And, some good old favorites that are worth their weight in gold: Medela Freestyle Pump (did you know that breastpumps are now covered under the Affordable Care Act?), Boppy, Gerber Nuk pacifiers, and Exersaucer (equivalent of this Triple Fun version - love the removable toy bar for younger babies).

Anything I'm missing?

By the by, I think there are more than 3 people who read this (my sister, mother and mother-in-law), so if you do, say hello!

Confidence

There were so many questions I had about how our life would change with child #2. Most of my friends with more than one kid would say that, yes, many things were more challenging, but also many things were more enjoyable because you had confidence in your parenting skills. I am finding that to be true, thankfully.

Not that we haven't had our struggles. We have, and continue to. (Example: up 4 times last night with a 4:45am feeding - ugh). In some ways, I also think parental confidence contributes to my frustration, mostly in the middle of the night. I'm anxious to get past this phase as I know the sweetness that is a child who sleeps for 11-12 hours. The first go round I didn't know any better!

I can read Georgia's cues better that I could with Ellen and I have the confidence to make more decisions on my own that seem right for our family rather than doing everything by the book. Our first week back to school/work was a crappy one due to a nasty viral illness, but before that I really thought Georgia was showing signs of dropping a feeding. I was generally waking her for all her feedings and she was starting to eat poorly at her last feeding because I think we were disrupting her sleep. Also, I wanted her to get in bed sooner so everyone else could go to sleep. Some of my books say that kids will start to go to 5 feedings around 13-14 weeks, though I don't think we did it with Ellen until like 18 weeks. Georgia's sickness derailed my plan in some ways, but also her appetite was poor and she was refusing to eat, thus dropping a feeding on her own. Instead of forcing the issue, I decided to go with it. The first couple of days were kind of rough and I emailed a friend for support to make sure I wasn't being crazy, but then it all just sorted itself out. I just kept telling myself - what is the WORST thing that could happen? Feeding her during the night? That's not so bad. (I did do that for 2 nights, then that was it). Also, if all else fails, you can revert to the old schedule. Her new schedule is much better for our school/work days, so I just made it work. There will come a time when our schedule as parents must revolve around the kid schedule, but now is not that time.

I've also been emailing with my cousin who is expecting her first child in the very near future. I generally walk a fine line between providing a lot of information about my experience and scaring the bejeezus out of people. I was telling her all about pumping, thus prompting me to look back at what I did with Ellen. I pumped WAY more with Ellen, mostly because I was afraid to stop for fear of a plummeting milk supply. I find that there just isn't a ton of info about how to fit pumping into your breastfeeding life if you are working full or part-time. I threw away tons and tons of milk with Ellen and still had like a 2 month supply in my freezer after I weaned her. I felt like I spent all of my time on "milk maintenance". This time, I clearly had the benefit of knowing that I would more than likely have a generous milk supply, so I've tried to do things to make sure I have adequate, but not excessive, milk for Georgia. With Ellen, I would feed her on one side and then pump - every morning for 9 months. I could have been sleeping!! I did this for awhile with Georgia, then just decided to feed her on both sides and I weaned off that morning pumping recently. Saves probably 10 minutes each morning, which is precious. Also, since I dropped a feeding, I only have to pump twice at work, another big time saver. I nurse her when she wakes up and pretty soon after we get home, then again before bed. She rarely refuses to eat on a side, but if she does I don't worry about it. With Ellen, I would have pumped. I've saved a lot of time and frustration ... and freezer space.

Feeding Gear

Let the fun begin!

Here is some gear that I've rounded up - I'll let you know how we like it as we go. Yes, I know that feeding your baby cereal could be as simple as food on your finger in your lap, but where is the fun in that? Just doing my part to stimulate the economy!

Inglesina Fast Chair - I originally had the Chicco chair, but the arms were too long for my counter (and I figured this out 6 months after I bought it and couldn't return it to Babies r'Us - check yours sooner!). Phil and Teds has a similar chair, but you can't remove the seat for washing.
Baby Cubes - lots of people just use ice cube trays, but I think this will work well for daycare - no transfer of frozen cubes and fewer containers to wash.
Boon Squirt - again, couldn't you just use a regular spoon? Sure, but I've read that this works well for daycare (just load and send) and especially when eating out and on-the-go!
Tiny Diner placemat
Kipiis Clips
Tilty Cup
(Also, check out the Zrecs Sippy Cup Showdown - pretty useful!)

Here are some baby food websites that I've found to be helpful.

Wholesome Baby Food
Nurture Baby - great checklist for baby nutrition (you know I love lists!)
Baby Food 101
Environmental Working Group Guide to Pesticides
Environmental Working Group Shopping Guide to Pesticides - List

I also have the Cooking for Baby cookbook that looks great. I've read that the Top 100 Baby Purees by Annabel Karmel, The Petit Appetit by Lisa Barnes and Super Baby Food by Ruth Yaron are also good.

As for kitchen tools, I am really going to try to not buy anything else! A fork and some elbow grease will work well when she can eat a little chunkier food. For now, I think we'll use a steamer basket in a pot on the stove or roasting in the oven. I already have an immersion blender that I use all the time. I've also heard the Magic Bullet works well - don't several of you have that thing collecting dust somewhere? I know we do!

My goal is to do a lot of shopping at the farmer's market this summer for local, organic produce. Frozen fruits and vegetables are also good if the fresh stuff is expensive or not in season. Finally, a good rule of thumb is to freeze food only once in each "state" - so you can freeze raw chicken, thaw and cook it and freeze it again. You cannot defrost raw chicken and re-freeze it without cooking it. If you mix breastmilk with food purees you need to use fresh milk, not milk that has already been frozen if you plan to freeze the food in cubes.

So, once again, any suggestions for 300+ ounces of frozen breastmilk?

Cutting your losses

R.I.P. cute green and white polka dot outfit.

We officially lost the first outfit today due to an explosion of massive proportions. I think that is pretty good at 6 months. We have a few white onesies with stains that I can see, but this was the first disaster.

I got the dirty clothes out of the plastic sack from daycare, lay them out on the sink to rinse, took a whif and thought, NOOOOO.

Also, I learned about the one drawback of the Medela Freestyle Pump today. If you forget it at home, it apparently doesn't work.

Grrr.

(Side note: I read a helpful hint about getting protein stains (formula / breastmilk) out of baby clothes - soak in Oxyclean and lay outside in the sunlight, especially for white clothes. Protein stains can apparently show up later - like after packing away baby clothes for the next baby. And, why do they even make white baby clothes?)

Registering

I was just passing along some tips to a friend who is pondering her baby registry and I thought it might be helpful to hear about how I went about the process ...

And it is a process.

As you can imagine, I had about 82 pieces of paper of all sizes piled in various places around the house with baby items I had to have.

Our little Gal was a bit of a surprise, but in retrospect, I still probably had a touch of the baby fever. I am a big fan of the internets and I read a LOT of blogs. I read some baby/parenting blogs before I was even pregnant, but I also read a lot of random blogs and design blogs and baby items would pop up from time to time. I just kept a running list by my computer. Now I do a similar thing with a Word document on my laptop. It is helpful for those items for bigger kids that I don't want to forget about.

So, when it came time to register, I had a list of items to consider. I still did TONS of research anywhere I could. Consumer Reports was really helpful for the safety items, car seat and stroller in particular. I read lots of reviews on the Babies r' Us website and on Amazon. True, you don't know anything about the people who write these reviews, but I still think you can get the general idea. I just learned about ZRecs and have found some helpful things there, too.

I also searched for registries of my friends who were pregnant or recently had a baby. It was a good cheat sheet to start with and I, of course, also emailed lots of questions to lots of people.

I chose to register only at Babies r' Us and a local baby store that had our baby furniture. I printed off the Must Have list and made notes at home about what I wanted in an effort to streamline the actual registering process. I, of course, picked several items that were only available online, which will be more or less of an issue depending where you live in relation to your friends and family.

Take someone with you when you register. My mom and I went during the day on a week day, which is KEY. Avoid Babies r' Us on the weekend at all costs!

Save ALL gift receipts! Babies r'Us has some ridiculous return policies and I have been stuck more than once. How you are supposed to know in advance that your baby won't use or won't like an item when they are 6 months old is beyond me. Also, if you get multiples of the same item (like baby bottles), don't open and wash all of them until you know your baby likes them.

If you are lucky enough to have wonderful friends and family like we do, you will get an embarrassing number of darling baby gifts. Like when you get married, it is so humbling that the special people in your life are SO nice. Truly, nice beyond belief.

The Girl was gifted with a number of burp cloths, bibs, blankets, bitty baby clothes and socks! I have loved every bit of it and find that I gravitate toward similar things when I buy baby gifts for other people. My point is this - don't register for these things!

Also, if you are smarter than me, you might find a way to assess what size baby clothes you get and trade some in for bigger sizes if needed. I can barely get every 0-6 month outfit on the Girl before she outgrows it, but the 6-12 month pile is tiny in comparison. (With grandparents close by, however, she won't go naked ...)

At 6 months, some of my everyday necessities are: sleep sack, pacifiers, changing pad, Lilly Padz, Medela Freestyle Pump, Medela bottles, Green to Grow bottles, Bumpy Name labels, bottle drying rack, dishwasher basket, milk storage bags, milk organizer, baby bathtub, Boppy, car mirror.

Bottom line, you will register for more than you need, and you will need many more things after your baby arrives. Use common sense - if it seems ridiculous, it probably is. There is a fine line between baby innovation and parent suckering. Also, think about how many outlets you have in your nursery and how many items you choose that need to be plugged in!

And, remember, one of the best things about being pregnant is that all of your nice friends will visit Babies r'Us to get goodies for your baby so YOU don't have to go!

A sad day, my friends

The Great Breastmilk Purge of 2009.

300 ounces.

I hope my Girl knows how much I love her because of all the kisses, cuddles and I-love-yous, but if there is any doubt, I'll show her this picture.

Random Thoughts: 6 months

Moving into week 24 (5 1/2 months, not 6 - again, bad math!) ...

Life is good!

Our Girl is happy and rested and on the brink of starting solids, which sounds fun, but I'm sure I'll miss the simplicity of just nursing.

I feel like our life is back to normal. Not the old normal, mind you, but a new normal that is really nice.

Only a few pounds of babyweight still linger, which I am very thankful for. Things certainly are not in the places they used to be, but I just didn't know what to expect and have been pleasantly surprised.

I had really hoped to breastfeed/pump for the first 6 months, and now that we are there, I don't really see any reason to stop. It is easy, inexpensive, and nice cuddle time. I already have wisps of sadness when I watch her nurse and realize that it won't last forever.

Pumping is still going well and it's a lot better to only pump twice at work. I haven't had any problems with my supply. I have noticed that the total amount I pump during the day is slowly decreasing (at a high of 21oz. at work, now more like 17oz.), but I still pump more during the day than she needs for bottles. I think it is probably due to drinking less fluids at work and being more active.

Just one more thing on sleeping (yeah, right!) ... This is a little chart that my very wise friend sent me and it's great for reference. (Seriously, she is on my speed dial for Mommy S.O.S.!)

How much sleep does your child really need? Use these guidelines:

1 week old: 16.5 total hours, including 4 naps

1 month: 15.5 total hours, including 3 naps

3 months: 15 total hours, including 3 naps

6 months: 14.25 total hours, including 2 naps

9 months: 14 total hours, including 2 naps

1 year: 13.75 total hours, including 2 naps

18 months: 13.5 total hours, including 1 nap

Age 2: 13 total hours, including 1 nap

Age 3: 12 total hours, including 1 nap

Age 4: 11.5 total hours, with no naps

Ages 5 to 9: 10-11 total hours, with no naps

Ages 10 to 15: 9-10 total hours, with no naps

Source: Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems (Simon & Schuster)by Richard Ferber, MD

I've been thinking quite a bit about our morning wake time of 6:00am. I picked that time WAY back when we were first implementing sleep training. I thought that was the time we would need when I went back to work. It works fine for us, but 6:00am is pretty early on those days at home and weekends. (Believe me, as a former night owl, it is shocking to me that 7:00am sounds like heaven!). My point is this: Some kids are probably just early risers and we may have one of those. It is all we can do to hold her off to 6:00am, but she is still sleeping at least 11 hours, so we can't complain. If I could do it over, I might have thought more creatively about how we could have gotten out of the house with a later wake time. I don't think there is any going back at this point!

Exersaucers are a god-send! Girly loves to be upright (she is nosy) and it keeps her entertained forEVER. As a side note, there is something about being in an exersaucer that induces pooping - beware!

Finally, check out The Soft Landing. It is a great website, started by a nurse, with all kinds of safe feeding items for baby. I have been using it as reference for a while now (good blog, and VIDEOS of items in use - genius!) and just realized that they are located in the Kansas City area! They are a web-only business, but for those of you who are local, you can order on their website and pick-up in Olathe to save shipping. Love supporting those local businesses!

Now, off to work on my order .... baby feeding supplies here we come!
(Any advice?)

Carpe Diem

It's really more like "Seize the opportunity", but I don't know Latin.

I know I've spent a ridiculous amount of time talking about our Gal's schedule. She's on it. She's off it. We're changing it. Blah, blah, blah.

I did something totally out of character this week and just went with it.

I was planning to move to the 4 hour schedule this weekend. My smart friend told me to just do it already - rip that band-aid off! But, nooo, how could I do that? In the middle of the week? I had a plan, you know.

Best laid plans ...

We were a little off schedule yesterday: Girly slept in (till 6:30, SOO not my prior definition of sleeping in). And then she took a great nap and I didn't want to wake her just yet. And then she took another great nap! And before I knew it, she was almost on the new schedule. I decided to just go with it - see if I could hold her off until 6:00 to eat and go to bed.

So many variables, you know! Eating later, only 4 feedings, 7oz instead of 6oz, earliest bedtime yet. Yikes! It is enough to push an OCD-mother over the edge. I perseverated about what to do when she woke up early because she was hungry.

You know what? IT WAS FINE. She even slept longer than ever before and was a perfectly delightful girl this morning. Instead of coming home with a color-coded potential new schedule from her daycare teacher, I got a glowing phone call about how well she did today.

I learned that we often underestimate our children. Given the opportunity, they will usually rise to the challenge!

(I also learned that Mr. Medela and I are relaxing our relationship. Feeding/pumping 4 times a day is SUPER).

Hi, My Name is Molly and I'm an Addict

Addicted to THE LOG, that is.

It is like a security blanket. Or an accessory brain. Or crack.

I confess that I have an embarrassing number of sheets of paper detailing the Girl's every feeding, diaper and amount of sleep for a ridiculously long time.

It was critical to keep track of all of this for the first few days, weeks even, but months? I just keep doing it and I can't stop! I see those sideways glances from my husband, like "Still? You're doing it still?" He just chalks it up to a "mom thing" and avoids the conversation.

I'll blame the lactation consultant at the hospital. They sent me home with the form and innocently told me to keep track of her feedings. That piece of paper should have a disclaimer on the top: "Warning! Highly addictive!"

Some background may be helpful here ... I am the kind of person who likes to make lists just so I can cross things off. I re-copy grocery lists so they are easy to read and organized. I copy the same appointments into no less than 4 calendars just in case. Say it with me ... A-N-A-L! Give me a form to fill out and a good ink pen and I am a happy girl. You can imagine my delight at finding a form that needed to be filled out so many times a day!

It is kind of cute to look back at all of the sheets of paper. (Yes, I've kept them. I'm telling you - addicted.) The first day home from the hospital, the sheet was perfect. Perfect handwriting. Each notation in it's own slot. Military time! Within about 37 hours you can see that everything is just scribbled wherever it fits and military time is quite challenging to keep track of with no sleep, so forget that.

Initially I truly found it helpful to keep track of how long she fed and how much sleep we were getting and when I took my pain meds. Your doctor will ask about wet and dirty diapers and it is helpful to have a record. Fortunately, our Girl never had trouble growing, but it would be helpful for that, as well. (Also, it is helpful to have the phone number to your lactation consultant at the top of the sheet so you don't have to dig around trying to find it when you need to call them. And, call early in the morning and leave a message and they will often call you back before they start rounds for the day.)

I just kept going, though. It allowed me to put a tiny part of my brain on paper so I didn't have to remember, "Left or Right?" When we started Cry It Out, I made notes about how long she cried so I could see our progress. It is so easy to forget what happens just a few days prior. When we made schedule changes, I kept good notes about bottles and naps and total amounts of sleep so I could try to problem solve if needed. She only has dirty diapers every few days now, so I can look at the log and see when I might expect a blow out. You know, useful stuff!

I felt (a little) vindicated yesterday when the Chronicles of a Babywise Mom blog wrote about keeping a log in the "good times", not only when you are making a change (she advocates keeping a log when you are dropping feedings or changing naps - you can see why I love her). If you don't know the typical pattern, it is hard to problem solve.

So, we'll try to make the switch to the 4 hour schedule this weekend. You can bet I'll be using my log to keep track of every.little.thing.

After we accomplish that? Who knows ...

My daughter can read!

That has to be the explanation.

It is clear that she wriggled her way over to my laptop, checked out the blog, and read all about my efforts to get her on schedule.

And she laughed that great baby laugh.

"Ha, Mom! You think you know me? Think again!"

This time I was prepared for change, I just wasn't prepared for the when. Already? Didn't we just do this?

When your daycare teachers start to comment on needing a new nap schedule and they make jokes like, "See, she's telling you she doesn't like her schedule!", I guess it is time to give in.

I'm hesitant because it is the change to the FOUR HOUR SCHEDULE. This is 4 feedings. This is 2 naps. This is BIG. (Well, big in my exciting world of over-analyzing your 5-month-old). I do feel like it is significant - she will likely (!) be on this schedule for about the next 6 months and I don't want to rush it.

She isn't showing me the signs I am looking for that indicate I need to make the switch. She isn't sleeping through her feedings (rather, it is the opposite - she is up early and needs to be entertained before it is time to eat), and she isn't acting uninterested in eating (again, the opposite - she acts like she has never seen food before).

On the flip side, she has been taking 3-4 short naps and she really does need to move to 2 better naps. It is more restful for her and will make my life easier being home only twice a day instead of four times a day. Plus, her teachers will like me again.

I initially thought I would mess with her schedule to keep 5 feedings and 3 naps, but the math just doesn't work with a 6am wake time and a 7pm bedtime and a 430pm pick up at daycare. Not to mention that at 6 months she really should be at 2 naps and that is only a few weeks away.

I decided to take advantage of the Memorial Day holiday to move to the 4 hour schedule. She'll be home with me for 5 days in a row and I think we can set the stage pretty well. Between now and then I'll move her feedings around and try to get 2 good naps and 1 catnap in the afternoons. We'll end up with feedings at 6a, 10a, 2p and 6p. Lots of kids do well with 12 hours of sleep at night, but if she goes to bed at 630, her Dad will never see her. So, I think she'll eat and have a bath and be in bed at 7pm.

Who wouldn't like that?

After her 6 month check-up we will start to add solids, so don't worry, I'll still have something to hyper focus on.

Note to Self #2

If you find yourself running ahead of time and feel proud of yourself for getting out of the house on time ... Don't.

Stop.

Think through what you just did.

Did you forget something?

Yesterday morning, I left the house 5 minutes early, which is unusual on the days when my cleaning lady comes and I am racing around to get things ready for her.

I felt pretty good!

Until, that is, I realized at 11:01am that I forgot to put any make-up on.

Baby Wrangling

Dressing a baby is a skill. It takes practice. I've got it down now, but at the beginning? Wow.

My husband still curses me in the morning when I lay out the "difficult" outfits.

A few tips that work for our daughter ...

Snaps and buttons are better than zippers. Most sleepers have a zipper front, which is easy in the middle of the night, but they "creep". The zipper front balloons out and needs to be tucked in just so when swaddling or nursing. Also, along those lines, I don't really like shirts and onesies with those crossover things on the shoulders. They always seem to stretch and grow through the day, so she ends up with her shoulder out or showing lots of cleavage. Snaps and buttons by the neck are better for us.

I find that Gerber stuff runs really small. Our daughter is very average sized (with short legs) and she barely fits in the 12 months onesies at 5 months. It does mean, however, that Gerber stuff can be really great for newborns because most other clothes will just be too big.

You can spend a FORTUNE on children's clothing, and I might in another life as Mrs. Surplus Income, but it is just too wasteful now for outfits she will only wear once or twice. I really like Carter's stuff for PJ's and everyday daycare clothes - washes and wears well and is inexpensive. You can generally catch great sales at Macy's or Kohl's. (And for the expectant mothers out there - their stuff is sized 3 months or 6 months or whatever, not 0-3 and 3-6 like most clothes. Totally confusing to me as I washed and put away clothes in those last few preggo weeks. Which pile? WHICH PILE?).

Every company has different sizes and obviously all of it will fit your child better or worse depending on their growth parameters. I find this to be a great annoyance, but I guess it shouldn't surprise me because it is pretty much the same when I shop for myself.

Here are some of my favorite kid's clothes - please add your comments below with your favorites!

* Hanna Andersson: A good friend of mine gets PJ's here for her boys and they are so cute.

* Mini Boden: Our nieces are always delightfully dressed and their stylish Mom finds good stuff here.

* Gap Kids / Baby Gap: I like their basics and Brennan's favorites. Their skinny leggings are especially good for our Girl because she has short legs and few pants fit her. They are also great for under dresses when it isn't warm enough for bloomers.

* Zutano: I really like their fun, colorful prints. And, I don't think their clothes ever have writing on them, which is sometimes hard to find.

* Tea: Again, great patterns without words. Not too grown up or too babyish. Plus, each collection is designed to mix and match. The Little House in the Creekwood Shops has a nice selection.

* Robeez: These are great little shoes and we are just starting to fit in the 0-6 month size.

* Trumpette Socks: This is probably the one baby clothing item that we have washed and worn the most. I love, love these socks - they are hard to kick off and SOOO cute!

As for clothing rotation ... our Girl has an embarrassing amount of darling clothes and it just kills me to find something in her closet that she hasn't worn and can barely fit into. She has a small closet in her room and a dresser. I loved hanging every itty bitty piece of clothing before she was born, and then promptly forgot about all of it because I was only digging in her drawers for PJ's and onesies.

I try now to peek in her closet once a week or so to see if there is anything that needs to be washed that she might fit into, then it goes into the clothing rotation in her drawer. Anything that is too small moves right to a storage box (and keep that storage box somewhere close to baby's room until it is full, otherwise you'll never make it to the basement to put the stuff away). Making it Lovely is a cute design blog. The writer just had a baby and she has a good way for labeling your boxes. Even better, share those boxes with your friends who have younger babies.

On the bright side, it is now a lot more fun to dress your baby than yourself!

Safety First

Not much to report on week 21. I learn more and more about our Girl's personality every day, but can't say that I have had any "aha! moments".

So ... a random, but hopefully useful topic.

I have (rather atypically) found myself having several conversations about guns in the last week or so. We don't own a gun and there will never be a gun in our home. As part of these conversations, I have repeatedly pointed out to my family members that I will need to ask other parents about their own gun policies once our Girl starts visiting friends.

Yes, I have time before this becomes an issue. But, you know me, obsess early and often!

I think my approach will be more "let me tell you about our home ... no guns, no pets, no drugs, no smoking, no prescription pain killers, no pool ..." and hope that the other parent follows suit. Our daughter does not attend an in-home daycare, but obviously the same issues apply.

For those of you with older children - how do you deal with this?

Other things I obsess about ...

Registered Sex Offenders in your neighborhood? Family Watchdog lets you search your neighborhood. There are a lot of issues with accurate tracking of registered sex offenders, but at least this is a start.

Infant CPR: We took a class before the Girl was born and it was terrifying and helpful. I keep the little cheat sheet on our refrigerator and should review it more often than I do. Ideally, all grandparents, aunts, uncles and caregivers should also have taken a CPR class. Check out your local Red Cross for more information.

Car Seat Installation: Something ridiculous like 85% of car seats are used incorrectly. This is so, so important. Our local police department does it for free (and my husband almost missed the birth of our child because the seat was being installed!). You can check Seatcheck.org for local sites. Even more importantly, make sure you understand how to install it on your own if the car seat will be taken in and out of the car.

Some Safety Sites ...
Check out Hip Monkey if you are planning to purchase a car seat or stroller (or other baby gear). They donate all proceeds from sales to a non-profit organization that provides safe car seats to kids in need. They offer free shipping on orders over $99 and no sales tax and sell only the safest models.

Choking Hazards: I'm becoming more and more aware of this and will have to be especially vigilant once the Girl becomes mobile. In planning a get together for young kids of all ages, I realized that I don't know what toys and games are really appropriate for a mixed crowd, so I'll go with the safest option - no parts smaller than your head! (Seriously, though, I think a good rule of thumb is anything that can fit through a toilet paper roll is a choking hazard.)

Recalls: It seems like items are recalled every day. While they are often publicized on TV or in the paper, they are easy to miss. Be sure to fill out the registration papers that come with your baby furniture or any big toys - they can notify you of recalls that way. I also find these Baby Bargains blogs to be useful (Book Blog, Baby 411)

Be careful out there!

Note to self

I always have to remind myself that crying at naptime and bedtime isn't a bad thing. Some babies NEED to cry as part of the soothing process.

The goal isn't to go to sleep quietly (although that is really nice). The goal is to go to sleep independently, whichever way works for your kiddo.

And, just to reinforce that crying has its purpose, we are back to sleeping through the night from bedtime to waketime. Only took three nights of not going into her room, each night better than the one before.

Except for last night when she cried out at 1:15am with a weird cry. I went to check on her and her head was pushed up against the bars of her crib.

I made an exception for that one.

Taking my own advice

We're officially on Day 5 of the new schedule with improvements on all fronts. And, I'm pretty sure about the time I feel confidant that all is settled, we'll be on to the next schedule ...

As mentioned, I moved Girly from 4.5 to 5 to 5.5 ounces over about 2 weeks. She did fine the first night after a day of 5.5 oz bottles, but she cried a lot during the second night. I wasn't sure if it was hunger or not, so I tried out 6oz bottles on Sunday and Monday and she did fine. This is still appropriate for her age, so we'll leave her there for now.

Remember what I said about "Start as you mean to go?" ... well ... we had gotten off track. After working so hard to reach quiet naps and bedtime, it became easy to just give her back the pacifier if she cried out. One time won't hurt, will it? She already knows how to soothe herself to sleep, right?

One time turned into several times a night and turned into several weeks of stumbling through the hall at 3am. Yes, I was only up for a minute, but disrupted sleep does not equal happy Mom. I kept thinking that it would just get better - that she would grow out of the habit.

Ha.

Also, remember what I said about parents teaching their children bad habits? Yep, guilty. I slowly acknowledged that our weeks of replacing the pacifier as a stop-gap method to get her to sleep had reinforced the night waking.

After polling my very wise friends who are better at this than I am, I've gone back to being hard core. I let her cry during naps and especially at bedtime and during the night. I'm not above giving her the pacifier once, but I have to hear in her cry that she is tired and will fall asleep and not that my visit to her room will stimulate her and make her think it is happyfunplaytime.

I was robbing her of the opportunity to learn to self-soothe. I just assumed that if I didn't go in, she would cry long and hard. In reality, it is almost always less than 10 minutes. Plus, she is learning to find her fingers/thumb to suck on, which helps. (She isn't quite to the point of finding her pacifier and putting it back in her mouth).

(As I type this, she woke from a deep sleep, cried for 4 minutes and fell back asleep).

One of the great quotes I read about "crying it out" was along the lines of this .... your child may cry for 10 or 20 minutes while falling asleep for a nap, and then sleep for 1-2 hours. If you can't stand to hear them cry that long and get them up, you are robbing them of hours of good sleep that they need. It is helpful to re-frame all of this: you are teaching them skills they need for life and providing them with restorative sleep.

So, the last two nights we have committed to not going into her room at all after she goes down to bed. She has cried less than 10 minutes while falling asleep and during any night waking. We went from going into her room up to 5 times a night, to last night she only woke once and went back to sleep. I peeked in from the door to make sure she was OK (and she was, of course).

(** this is one of the great things about foregoing bumpers in the crib - I can see into her bed from the door to make sure she is OK, without her really seeing me**)

Everyone is more rested and we're on the right track (again) ...

24 hours in ...

So far, so good with the Big Switch.

The Girl really didn't seem phased by dropping a feeding and moving bedtime around, at least not that she let us know (yet).

Our Girl has been on a 3 hour eating schedule pretty much since birth. I fed her every 3 hours when we came home from the hospital. "They" say you should have 8-12 feedings in 24 hours, but I think there have only been one or two days in her life when she had more than 8. She just didn't demand food and she was growing fine, so 8 worked well. Since she started sleeping well pretty early, she was at 7 feedings in 24 hours pretty early on.

About the time she really slept through the night and we started the "cry it out" (around 6 weeks), she was down to 6 feedings a day (6a, 9a, 12p, 3p, 6p, 9p).

Some babies stretch out the 3 hour feeding schedule pretty early, but since she slept so long at night, I really felt she needed the nutrition during the day.

At about 11 weeks, we started to move up the 9pm feeding by 15 minute increments. When I started back to work at 12 weeks, her last feedings of the day were at 530p and 830p. At 15 weeks the last feeding was at 815p and at 16 weeks the last feeding was at 8p.

I began to notice that she only "snacked" at the 530p feeding - nursed a few minutes each side and really preferred to chat instead. She would then take a full feeding before bed. I wanted it to be the reverse, and took this as a sign that she was ready to drop a feeding. In retrospect, I also think this had something to do with the fact that she was getting 3-4 bottles on daycare days instead of her typical 1 on home days.

(Side note: When we started the bottle at 3 weeks we arbitrarily picked 4 oz. and she did fine. We moved up to 4.5 oz. pretty shortly thereafter, and really never increased it again. The Girl rarely acts hungry, so it is hard to tell if she needs more).

I tried to ease the adjustment from 6 to 5 feedings. I changed the evening feedings to 545 and 745p for several days, then we had an illness interruption, and then the feedings were moved to 600p and 730p for a few days. Starting yesterday, I just combined those feedings into one at 700p. Also, over the last 2 weeks her bottles were moved up to 5 oz. and she did fine (no extra spitting up and still taking the full feeding when due) and now she is getting 5.5 oz.

I decided to make the change over the weekend when we had several days at home to adjust before starting school again next week. Also, being the OCD person I am, I will give her bottles for 3 of her 5 feedings for these few days to help with the adjustment. I want to make sure she is eating enough so if she gets up during the night I can be pretty sure it isn't hunger. It is a lot harder for me to judge when she is just breastfeeding.

Our schedule is now eating at 6a, 930a, 1230p, 330p and 700p (a combo 3/3.5 hour schedule). I would have liked to do a 3.5 hour schedule, but it just doesn't work with our work and daycare schedules, so this will do for now. She still takes 3 or 3.5 naps during the day for a total of 4-5.5 hours of sleep, and then goes to bed at 730p and gets up at 600a.

(Side note 2: Our Girl has always napped more than the "typical" child, and I am totally OK with that. As long as she slept well at night, I didn't care if she had more naps than she "should". I think a lot of kids have 2 good naps and 1 variable nap until about 6 months, then drop to 2 naps. She really is at 3 good naps with a variable 4th nap.)

This is probably way too detailed of an account of the Switch, and in many ways I made it a bigger deal than it needed to be. My challenge was that I read as much as I could about how to do this ... and there isn't much information. I have books that describe sleeping and naps well, and books that describe feeding well, but have yet to come across a book that explains how the two ideally work together (while also taking breastfeeding and milk supply issues into account). The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems comes closest, but she advocates a 4 hour schedule starting at 3-4 months (which generally means 4 daytime feedings), with an extra feeding during the night. No thanks - we are past that.

Maybe the moral of the story is that a book just can't explain exactly how it will work for your child. Most advice says that your child will just let you know when they are ready .... I'm not sure what that means.

Books help, but a lot of it is really paying attention to your baby's cues.

I'm still trying to learn her language, but we'll get there.

Whoops, we broke our baby

Ahhh .... how quickly you forget.

As I've said, we worked darn hard to get our Girl to sleep and nap well. All of our hard work paid off and we had a pretty blissful existence for weeks 10-17 of her life. Starting at about 4 months, though, some little issues started to sneak in.

I've read that some sleep issues can crop up around 4 months, perhaps having to do with the fact that your baby is getting much stronger, more independent and on the verge of reaching a lot of developmental milestones.

Naps still went pretty smoothly for us, and she went to sleep really easily, but there started to be lots of waking during the night. During the early morning hours. Boo.

At first it would just be once or twice a night - she would cry out from a deep sleep and would fall right back to sleep if we put her pacifier back in her mouth. Then, it became several times a night, usually between midnight and 4am. And, it appeared that she was wiggling out of her swaddle, or at least getting her hands up by her face.

We struggled with the correct response ... give her the pacifier or cry it out? Since she fell back asleep so easily, it seemed easiest to replace the pacifier. Multiple minutes of crying at 3:15am doesn't seem like the right solution for anyone. However, we got to the point of replacing the pacifier 4 or 5 or 6 times a night, which was a bad habit.

To further complicate matters, I really felt the swaddle was the root of her problems. I thought she was wiggling around so much that she woke herself up and cried. I loved the swaddle, and still do. It was becoming clear, though, that she was just getting too big and too strong and it needed to go.

It happens that all of this took place the week or two before I planned to move around her feeding and sleeping schedule and I knew it wasn't fair to do all of it at the same time. I had to postpone the feeding schedule change due to sickness, but on Saturday morning she was her normal happy self and I took advantage of the opportunity to de-Swaddle.

Wow.

I miss my easy baby!

I decided to go cold turkey on the swaddle. I've read lots of opinions, but most said it didn't really matter if you did one arm out, two arms out, then quit. I found an internet post from the maker of The Miracle Blanket and he also recommended cold turkey as the best way to go. (You can find anything on the internets!) I never used The Miracle Blanket, but even the maker said 4 months is about the time to stop using it.

Girly was almost always quiet in her bed, or she cried a little and fell asleep. The first day I heard her talking in her bed and going back to sleep on her own, I thought the swaddle could go. I just picked her next nap and substituted a Sleep Sack for the Swaddle Me. You may be asking yourself - "why is she using another prop that will need to go later?" True - this might bite me - but I think the routine is a good sleep cue.

Lots of crying ensued. A 4-month-old can cry longer and harder than a 6-week-old and it makes me happy we did our sleep training way back when!

It is also fascinating that Girly really didn't know what to do with her arms. She never had the experience of having "arms" in her bed when she slept, so they just flailed about. She would hit herself or take her pacifier out and then get mad. She also slept like a mummy with her arms out in front of her. (Cute!)

She napped pretty poorly Saturday and Sunday, although she was so exhausted by bedtime that she went to sleep pretty well. She apparently did well at daycare on Monday, and did so-so at home on Tuesday. Tuesday night was good - she went to bed without a peep and only woke once in the wee hours of the morning. She woke up happy at 5:15am - too early - but she talked in bed for about half an hour before really getting mad.

I am hopeful that she will be "adjusted" by this weekend. And, I am hopeful that the middle of the night shout outs will be a thing of the past, because I'm still not sure what the "proper" response is.

Next task: Move from 6 to 5 feedings and move bedtime to 7pm.

So help us God.