Purge

My Inbox is swallowing me alive. I used to pride myself on having no more emails in my Inbox than I could see on one screen. In the last few weeks, however, it has gotten completely out of control for reasons that are still unclear. I've been filing things away in my "blog to do" folder for that elusive day when I have time to blog. So, I'm just going to purge and link to a lot of things here that you may or may not find interesting. Or may or may not have time to read (I'm voting on "may not" - you won't hurt my feelings). Is it bad that cleaning out my Inbox feels like cleaning up my  house?

So, some reading for your relaxing Labor Day weekend plans at the pool. Wait ... are you doing that? Take me along.

What Should a 4-Year-Old Know: I think this is kind of viral on the Facebook, but was timely for me as I'm trying to restrain myself from worrying about Kindergarten ONE YEAR AWAY. (And also, a few concrete guidelines that help reign in my craziness).

Why I Am The Perfect Mother. God bless "average".

Child Safety: Stranger Danger Warning Needs Updating - I know I've posted about this before, but it is a conversation I need to keep having with Ellen. I like the ideas about teaching safety as a value, just like kindness and honesty and whatever else. Also, adding "Did anything happen today to make you feel uncomfortable?" to your standard questions about the day. And teaching about acceptable strangers.

"If my son wanted to dance, I would kill myself" - can't remember where I came across this, but nice story about celebrating the interests of your children.

Similarly, How Do You Teach The Beauty of Different - good tips.

The Last Time - also went kind of viral, but sweet and tear-inducing. I find myself compulsively documenting Georgia's sweet quirks these days, knowing that in the midst of all these developmental milestones, so many things will fall by the wayside.

How To Teach Kids To Say Sorry - We haven't really used "time out" for Ellen in years. On rare occasion when she is out of control, I do ask her to sit in a chair and calm down before coming back to talk with me. Most of the time, though, we talk things through and I explain why I am upset or frustrated with her behavior and I ask her how she could make a better choice next time. It works pretty well for us. The biggest AHA! I had lately, though, is that for your children to really learn the importance of apologizing, you need to apologize to them when appropriate. Not long ago, I lost my temper with Ellen during crazy-after-work-dinner-hour. I raised my voice and I don't think she expected it and she sulked away to the couch and cried quietly. I felt, in a word, terrible. I sat down for a snuggle and really apologized to her and explained why I had acted that way. Made us both feel better.

My Daughter Went Away to Camp and Changed - I've been very nostalgic for my days at Summer Camp lately. This was a nice article about the importance of activities that belong solely to your children and the happiness that comes with that freedom.

We Need To Talk About Race and How Do You Talk To Kids About Race? - I think a lot of good points here. This is something I fumble through with Ellen in our very homogeneous community. I mostly remember a part of the Nurture Shock book that  talks about the "being blind to color" approach and how it doesn't really work. You need to talk with your children about race and not let them draw their own conclusions. Another area in which I feel ill-equipped to be raising a responsible human being, but I will try my hardest.

Raising Safe Swimmers and Here Comes the Sunscreen (gallery of pics of parents putting sunscreen on kids). Summer's over? How? When?

Well, if you have a kid who started back to school, check this out: Crayola Starts a new Recycling Program

This Morning I Yelled - I've linked to Dash and Bella before, good recipes, great writing

 Great Artist Mom - fun blog by a gal who developed an art program for elementary students. She has good ideas for encouraging artistic behavior, and practical tips on supplies, and nice videos here and there on drawing. A little advanced for Ellen, but she likes to watch me and then color in my drawings. One big take away that we use: "You are the artist of your own paper". I'm trying to get Ellen to not be such a perfectionist with her art ... wonder where she gets that?

Three Huge Mistakes We Make in Leading Kids - Again, I see this so many places, the importance of specific praise for children, not just platitudes.

A reminder to Get In The Picture With Your Kids! We just had our latest round of family pics with our favorite photographer. I wanted to document Georgia as she has changed so much from December, but also to have pictures of me with the girls. I spend most of my days with them, yet have little documentation of that.

I bet you do this anyway - narrate your day to your baby - but this reinforces the importance! The Power of Talking to Your Baby.

Nice series on Slate: How Babies Work - lots of interesting articles on babies, American vs. other, and some science behind infant development and such.

12 times a day

On my days at home, I calculated that I am feeding myself or someone else 12 separate times a day. What the what. Georgia is still nursing 4 times a day and then eats solids 3 times a day, though her "dinner" really stretches from 5-6:30 in spurts to keep her happy while the rest of us eat. Ellen eats the typical 3 meals, and generally 1-2 snacks which I didn't even count. I eat breakfast and lunch somewhere after I've fed both girls, then prep dinner so we can all sit down together for 9 minutes. I need roller skates.

Speaking of roller skates, my "advanced" age and the last pregnancy really did a number on my feet. I feel like a seriously old lady hobbling around all day. I haven't worn heels in almost 5 years and my feet still groan. I finally got some silver Gizeh Birkenstocks because I was trying to avoid a specialist visit and orthotics (told ya - that's an old lady word). I think they are working and - BONUS - it appears that Birkenstocks are all the rage in Paris this summer. Trend. Setter.

Georgia finally dropped her 3rd nap just past 9 months. It makes bedtime much more predictable - she is generally so exhausted she goes straight to sleep - but it also means that her last feeding needs to start at about 6:32pm. If it's 6:40pm she might start melting. It also means that the witching hour of 5:00-6:00pm really requires lots of song and dance to keep G happy. As I tell Ellen (frequently) - "The name of the game is Keep Georgia Happy". It's not that she isn't happy ... in fact, she is generally very happy, but I like to keep the status quo.

And, speaking of beds, one Sunday night I sat Georgia in her bed while I was picking up some things in her room and I just thought, "Huh. She looks like she could just throw herself out of bed, if only she could sit up on her own." I told Erik we needed to move her mattress lower and put it on the to-do list. The next morning I found her sitting up in bed. Mommy instinct. We moved her mattress down that night, and then she was clapping and crawling within 2 days. Spurts in development are amazing.

Back to food, we are on a good mix of spoon foods (fruit and yogurt for breakfast, some kind of veggie for lunch or lentils or cottage cheese, and usually a meat of some kind for dinner) and finger foods. The latest finger foods are string cheese cut up into tiny cubes, frozen mixed veggies or broccoli that I chop up, and random veggies or leftover eggs from our meals during the week. I also got frozen organic blueberries at Whole Foods and they are the little tiny wild blueberries - perfect size for G. Admittedly, I'm a little too OCD to let her mash them all over the place, but she loves them straight out of the freezer and still a little slushy. Also, I got a pack of small whole wheat tortillas at Whole Foods that don't have a lot of weird ingredients and I cut them in fourths and spread them out on a sheet to freeze them individually. I can pull one out, zap it for 10 seconds in the microwave, and then tear it up for her. She eats an unreal amount of food. I also got her to start drinking from a straw. I thought it would be easier for our upcoming trip and just got a Playtex sippy cup with a straw lid. We practiced for a day or two and I could squeeze the cup to get the water to come up through the straw so she knew what was happening. In contrast, it took Ellen a long time to figure out the straw - I think she was older.

And, back to nursing. (My thought patterns are like this all day - scattered scattered scattered). My milk supply continues to drop, but I want to keep nursing G through our vacation as it's just so much easier. I finally had a lightbulb moment and switched the breast shields on my pump back to the smaller size and it has increased my supply - maybe an extra 1-2 ounces each time I pump, which isn't a ton, but certainly something. I gave G her first bottle of formula today at home just as a test to make sure we had a back up for vacation and she sucked it right down - no problem. In fact, she looked so proud of herself laying down and drinking the bottle all by herself. Thanks a lot.

Feeding, Breast and Otherwise

I feel like if I had a third baby (not in the plan) I would really get this nursing / pumping thing down. I'm like the Goldilocks of breastfeeding - too much, too little - and I haven't quite gotten to the juussstt riigghhttt part.

With Ellen, I've come to the realization that I had a SERIOUS oversupply of milk. When you see how much milk was in my freezer, I think you would agree, but it didn't occur to me at the time how unusual it was. I started to wean her at 9 months, she was fully weaned at 10 months, and she still had breast milk through 12 months. Not exclusively, but most of her feedings each day were breast milk. Crazy. And, that was after I had purged about 600oz of milk shortly after I went back to work for lack of freezer space. That's all fine and good, except it also reflects the fact that I pumped every morning after I nursed her (literal time suck), and many times during the day if she didn't nurse well, and I leaked when she was due for a feeding almost every time for 9 months. No bueno.

So, with Georgia I was trying to reach a happy medium. I ordered 6 boxes of freezer storage bags before she was born and have barely cracked the second box. I have a little bit of milk in the freezer, but probably only a week's worth, and I find myself thawing some each week to make up the balance of her bottles and not putting any back. I think any time spent breastfeeding is worthwhile and I know 9 months is an accomplishment, but I have an unrealistic standard for myself based on the first go-round and I'm a little stressed about my supply.

I stopped pumping after the first morning feeding around the time I went back to work because I just couldn't make it fit with the morning (harried) routine. But, I think most breastfeeding moms will say that they can pump the most milk in the morning and sometimes relatively little late in the day. I would always pump if Erik gave her a bottle, but if that was the last feeding of the day, I wouldn't always pump an equivalent amount. So, it's kind of a vicious cycle of chasing your tail. I was pumping enough at work to make her bottles, but that has slowly tapered down (and probably accelerated when she was sick for 2 weeks and feeding poorly) and now I'm not. I know it's not a big deal to give her formula, but I would like to avoid the cost if I can. Also, if I'm being really honest, I'm just not ready to wean her. She isn't disinterested in nursing at this age like Ellen was. It's fast and easy. It burns calories! So, we'll see how much longer we can hang on ...

Finally, in reading about pumping and supply and such, I've come across a few things about the motor on your breast pump wearing out. I'm not sure what Medela would say, but I've seen a few posts from moms who exclusively pumped about their motor wearing down. Not that it would quit, but was just less effective. I didn't exclusively pump the first time, but sure pumped A LOT, and I wonder if that may be contributing? Too late for me to get another pump, but might be worth investigating for someone else and I think many insurance companies cover the cost of pumps under the Affordable Care Act.

So, moving on to solids. Again, unrealistic standards I set for myself. I've decided that part of the reason I cook most of the food for my babies is because that is one of the ways I show people I love them. I like to cook, and generally find it kind of relaxing, but also I think I'm good at it. Not gourmet and not an expert, but cooking doesn't scare me. I'm not the best mom at taking my kids on adventures or reading all day long or playing sports with them, but cooking I can handle.

That being said, I spent 6 hours in the kitchen last Saturday (Ellen was gone which is the only reason it was possible) cooking for Georgia and I wondered at the end of it What.The.Hell.I.Was.Doing. I used to make the argument that it was cheaper to make your own baby food and I think it can be if you are strategic, but for me it always involves a trip to Whole Foods (with some extra things thrown in the cart, OF COURSE) and then 1+ hours cooking. Maybe (maaayyybbee) I break even if compared to organic food pouches.

But, I like knowing exactly what goes in her mouth and I love that she eats it up. Seriously - this girl can EAT. Hasn't turned her nose up at a single thing! We are venturing into meat and chunkier textured foods and I still find that the recipes on Nurture Baby are some of my favorite. I made the pork with apples and sweet potatoes last weekend in the crockpot, and the chicken soup (minus pasta, stirred cooked brown rice in after I pulsed it up), and the turkey and white beans. For all the recipes I strained the solids out and pulsed in the Cuisinart until tiny chunks, but not smooth.  I figured out the easiest way to freeze it is to use a small ice cream scoop and freeze single scoops on a foil-lined baking sheet, then move to a plastic freezer bag. We are stocked for 1-2 months and maybe then she'll be on mostly finger foods. Phew.

Finally, on the feeding front, I've wised up and realized that baby puffs are just an expensive thing to sweep up from the floor. Georgia really wants to have some kind of food to eat while we have dinner, so puffs kept her happy, but I've switched to puffed brown rice from Whole Foods. It comes in a plastic bag in the cereal aisle and is about $2 and lasts forever. They have all kinds of puffed grains, but rice seemed about the right size to start with.

And, just a health note of sorts. In the midst of Georgia's two week respiratory junky awful-ness, she was found to have an ear infection and we started amoxicillin. About a week later I noticed she had a little rash on her back, which progressively worsened over about 5 days. It conveniently started the day she first had wheat (pasta) and was worse the next day when she had wheat again. So, I took all wheat out of her diet, stressed about a wheat allergy, and racked my brain about what she could possibly be eating that would make her rash worsen. I took all sorts of stuff out of her diet (I had really just been giving her anything and not keeping track of what/when) and it was super annoying. We've come to the conclusion that she has the relatively common amoxicillin-associated rash, which I guess isn't a true allergy. It just didn't occur to me that the medicine would be the culprit because the rash started about a week after we started the medicine, but I guess that is how it typically starts. Sooo ... if your kid starts a new medicine, maybe be more mindful of what they are eating and not starting any new foods to save yourself a lot of time Googling "nightshade family allergies".

Summer schedule?

Guess I'm taking a not-planned, but clearly obvious break from this here blog. I find that the recovery from all things involving two small children takes, like, weeks. I wouldn't say we've been all that busy, but we were out of town for a long weekend, followed by a week of swimming lessons every evening, followed by a sick baby and, well, I know you get it. Harried is an understatement.

A couple of updates:

One, Ellen's bedtime had degenerated into a mess. Georgia is so easy these days, but Ellen's bedtime routine just required so.much.energy from both Erik and me at the time of day it was hardest to muster. So - new plan. We have two "tokens" (random pieces of wood I dug out of her treasure box and labeled 1 and 2). We do the regular brush teeth / potty / PJs / book / bed and try to move it along. She has 2 tokens to start the night. She can leave her room for "free" to potty as long as she gets back in bed by herself. If she needs to talk to me or Erik she can spend a token to do so, but only has 2 passes. If she keeps her tokens, though, in the morning she gets 1 or 2 stars on her ice cream chart. (I drew a picture of ice cream and filled it with little circles where the stars go). When her chart is full, ICE CREAM! I do randomly give her a star during the day if she does something especially good without prompting, but it's mostly a bedtime thing. I've also taken away stars for especially bad behavior. One time I was going to take away a star and forgot and I told her later she was lucky. "Well, too late now, Mom. HA HA!!" So, I then I erased one for sass. It has actually worked pretty well - we will see for how long. She did ask Erik to come up and scratch her back the other night - "It was worth a token, Dad."

Georgia was sicky, sick this week - same usual respiratory crap. Pro tip for the future: if you own a nebulizer machine and have the meds at home, take it all with you to the doctor's office visit. You can use all your own stuff and save yourself the $$ of getting it there. DUH. I'm sure we will be back ...

And, some stuff I've come across:
Good Guard, Bad Guard - how to know if your lifeguard is doing a good job. Ellen took swimming lessons for a full week and made great progress, but is still not swimming. She is almost LESS safe in the water because she feels confidant, but doesn't yet understand about quickly going into deep water and such. I was watching her and within seconds she took a few steps into the deeper end and was underwater and panicking and my friend had to jump in and pull her out. Not good times.

Similar to the emergency link last time, tips on packing a Go Bag. We haven't done this and, truthfully, I kind of glaze over when I think about it because it seems so monumental. I have a goal of becoming much more paper-less with our important things, which fits nicely with this. A high school acquaintance recently had a bad house fire, which makes all of this feel more important. And, makes me feel that Ellen really is old enough to start talking about this stuff. Again, glazing over ...

Some of my best friends are germs - really interesting article in the New York Times about the microbiome. Well, interesting for you science-y folk. Most fascinating part to me? There are compounds in breastmilk that babies can't digest, but they are specifically intended to nourish good bacteria in the baby's gut. Amazing.

Why Women Aren't Crazy - interesting article, with a take-away message of using caution in how you address your children, girls in particular. I find myself often telling Ellen - "you are so dramatic!" and over time, I think it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. I'm trying to be more aware of what I say to her or how I describe her actions.

Finally, there was a nice article in Parents magazine this month about encouraging kindness in your children - teaching it as a skill, just as you would responsibility and independence and such. For those of you who have time to read, it lists two interesting-sounding books: Raising Happiness: 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and Happier Parents, and Becoming the Parent You Want to Be. It basically talks about listening to your kids - is their complaint about a tummy ache or hurt toe masking their desire for an extra snuggle or some special attention? Also, cultivating a culture of cooperation - helping your kids pick-up. Essentially, if there is a situation where you would normally like some help for yourself, do the same for your children. I must say that I'm probably not good at this - it would be kinder of me to offer to help Ellen at times, and then hope my example encouraged her to do the same for others. And, being kind to yourself - taking time to do nice things for yourself is part of taking care of your family.

Summer safety

I feel like every time it gets warm I put something on here about water and sun safety. So, consider me a broken record and settle in for a similar read. I am hyper about water safety - it is probably one of my most anxious-making kid tasks. We are FINALLY getting some real swim lessons this summer and I have high hopes. I also have terrible guilt about the sun exposure I had myself as a child / teen - how could I have been so stupid? By the time you are old enough to realize the error of your ways, TOO LATE. So - trying to start my girls off on the right foot.

The New York Times - The New Rules for Sunscreen

And, this article has been everywhere,  but it's a good one, so just in case: Drowning Doesn't Look Like Drowning

And, while we're at it, from Rookie Moms - Safety Tips I Learned From My Village.  Do you have a family disaster plan? A fire escape plan? Do you practice? These are other things that keep me up at night.

Also, sort of related, a random tip to get in the habit of smelling your child's liquid medicine when you pick it up from the pharmacy. Especially if it's something given for a long period of time, like Georgia's Zantac. It is flavored with a peppermint flavor and smells kind of minty / medicine-y, but she really hasn't made any faces about it since she was bitty. She gets it twice a day and it is no issue now. Well, one day recently she flat out REFUSED to take it. Like, after 5 attempts - no go. I had recently refilled the bottle, so I smelled it and it smelled horrible - like minty, rotten food. I called the pharmacy to make sure it wasn't expired or anything and it wasn't, but they checked the bottle and agreed something was "off". They replaced it with a different brand and there hasn't been an issue since. So strange and NEVER would have occurred to me.

Feeding the girl, take two

Well, gosh, nice to see you again. Been awhile. Sorry about that.

We're elbow-deep in baby food over here, so thought I would just note what we are doing this time, though it's basically what we did last time. I started to explore Baby-Led Weaning, and actually really like and agree with the concept, but in the end, I feel like I don't have the time and patience to devote to it right now. Is that terrible? It also sounds counter-intuitive, as baby-led weaning seems like it should be easier, but I have to wrap my head around a whole new idea and way of planning our meals and I just don't have the mental energy right now.

So, purees it is, at least for a little while. I'm making them and am relying on my microwave, toaster oven, Magic Bullet Blender, ice cube trays and Baby Cubes, just like last time. In a moment of weakness, I bought the Magic Bullet Baby Steamer on a whim from the clearance end cap at Target. The jury is still out. I generally don't agree with appliances that are solely for feeding babies, but I thought it might be helpful to steam a little bit of our dinner to make it more Georgia-friendly. We'll see.

I'm concerned about Georgia being a more allergy-prone kid because she has the most sensitive skin, though I don't know that there is any true correlation. Our pediatrician advised starting with rice cereal, which we did, but that requires extra breast milk for mixing and, frankly, I don't have a whole abundance. Plus, Georgia didn't seem all that enthused with it, so we went right to apples. Then, peas, butternut squash, avocado, banana, pears, peaches and sweet potato. I started to wait the 3 days for each, then just moved ahead. I feel like I wanted her to have some variety? I guess I'll be a little more cautious with the more allergy-type foods. Our pediatrician advised waiting till a year or after for the really allergenic foods, but there is some new data about introducing them quickly after starting solids, which I think we will do.

And, as has become custom, a few recent articles / posts I've come across on the topic:
This Just In - Babies Eat Food from Dinner: A Love Story
And, as linked to, Our Take on Baby-Led Weaning by YoungHouseLove (read this blog all the time!)
Cooking for Hugo: A French Food Education by The Wednesday Chef - she has several posts on cooking for her young son. I think I'm late to this food blog, but I really like it in general
Feeding Baby by Bluejean Gourmet - came across this on Twitter in response to the above post. Love the innernets! This is a great hybrid version of purees and baby-led weaning, I think. She also links to a few other great posts at the bottom - Getting Started by Hellobee, and the series Cooking for Clara on Food52.

And, not food related, but kind of a nice belated Mother's Day post - from the New York Times, Baby Face.

Have Baby, Will Travel - the infant edition

Welp. We're home from my girls (plus one breastfed baby) weekend. Though there were quite a few pitfalls, the excellent catching-up-with-friends times resulted in a net success over all.

I had to be hands free, so I looked much like a sherpa climbing a mountain with someone's gear: Baby in Bjorn, backpack full of baby essentials, diaper bag with carry on items that weren't quite as essential, and one roller bag stuffed to the gills. All of this for what ended up being 3 nights and 2 full days. I am a chronic over-packer and, while I can reduce my own stuff to mostly essentials, there are just a lot of baby contingencies. (AND my friends brought a car seat, pack n'play and stroller. Can you even imagine if they didn't? Guess G wouldn't have gone on vaca).

I picked up Georgia from daycare on the day before our trip and her sweet teacher, who can cuddle babies with the best of them but speaks relatively limited English, greeted me with a, "Oh, sweetie girl Georgia. Lots of diarrhea." AWESOME. This prompted some texts with her regular teacher to get some clarity on the actual poop situation that day. Again, AWESOME. Miss G has been blowing out her diapers everyday - I think due to new diapers - so we reverted to the good ol' Pampers Swaddlers for the trip, a size bigger, and she was fine all weekend. Phew.

I did read a tip about traveling with baby that I thought was helpful ... I packed 4 quart-size ziploc bags with a diaper and disposable changing pad in each, plus accessible wipes. This allowed for one quick grab when it was time to change a diaper (plus a bag to dispose it in) instead of shuffling all through the baby bag. I packed lots of sanitizer wipes and such but the reality is that Georgia isn't really touching anything and I didn't have any free hands once on the plane to wipe things down. Oh well.

Otherwise the essential carry-on bag had a change of clothes for G, a few burp cloths (she is a spitty baby), one quiet-ish toy, dipes/wipes, a bottle of milk with a gel freezer pack in a neoprene wine cooler bag, a bottle of water for me, and my phone/wallet/chapstick. The non-essential carry-on bag had a change of clothes for me and an extra outfit for G, a few more dipes, medicine, breast pump and parts, nursing cover and light blanket for emergency feedings (I'm not a public nurser). My system worked pretty well - stashed the essential bag in front of my seat, non-essential overhead with Bjorn. You can't wear a baby in a Bjorn for take-off or landing, so might as well not use it at all. I also grabbed an extra cup at Starbucks so I could give it to the flight attendant with the bottle to add some warm water. Worked great.

Not much to add other than the expected difficulty napping in a strange place and strange bed. I called ahead to inquire about an iPod dock for white noise, but ended up using a fan in our room and it was perfect (we all stayed in a rented house). Georgia just really only sleeps well at home, which is good for 95% of our life. 

Oh, and a word about pumping. I took a bottle of milk with us on the plane, but didn't really have a way to bring more milk. I had arranged for a sitter for Friday night and Saturday afternoon and all of a sudden it got kind of stressful to make sure I was pumping enough to have bottles for her when I left. I was pumping after each feeding and before bed and barely had enough. I'm not sure how I would have remedied this as Georgia hasn't ever had formula, but I might have packed an emergency single serving or two, just in case.

The trip stress was mostly related to flight cancellations / stuck jetways / delays and layovers in airports. Not much you can do to control that, though it is 10X more stressful with a baby. We were initially flying American who specifically said I didn't need any identification documents for Georgia, though we switched to Southwest at the last minute and they require a birth certificate or immunization record. I never ordered a copy of G's birth certificate (terrible!), so I fortunately had access to her shot record. Plan ahead on that one. Also, Southwest was great so I could board with "family boarding" and get an aisle seat. Seems to me that aisle is best if traveling alone with a small child for easy in and out. I think a window is great with a young toddler and/or if you are flying with another adult.

I took a picture with my iPhone of G in the airport and a quick pic the morning we left just to document that she was there, but otherwise no time/hands for pictures. Here are a few non-travel-related kid/media things I've come across lately:
The Kids Should See This - videos that kids will love, but not specifically made for kids
The Stories Objects Hold at Sesame Ellis 
And, as she links to, Kids Were Here
And an inspiring photo blog of kid pictures - You Are My Wild

At it again ...

I have little of consequence to report; just been the typical routine around here. I'm the sick one this time and - newsflash - your kids are happy to bring home germs AND they don't give two shits that you are sick. I'm wearing my OLD glasses this weekend because I have pinkeye and Georgia can't seem to figure out who I am. Ellen, on the other hand, thinks I look like a newscaster.

I moved Georgia to a four schedule, which is really so great. I remember dreaming of this when I was up so frequently with her during the night when she was a newborn. Following the trend, I worried about it much less this go round ... just casually moved her evening feedings closer together and added some more milk to her school bottles, then just dropped a feeding and she was fine. No biggie. I think she is seriously the most flexible child of all times. I kept pumping before I went to bed to maintain a 5th "feeding", but wasn't getting much milk for the effort. I had such a crazy milk supply with Ellen that my benchmark is skewed and I feel like I don't have enough, yet I'm still putting a little milk in the freezer at the end of each week. I decided to stop with the pumping on most nights and we'll see how it goes.

Her napping is generally quite good. Not at school, mind you, but her Thursdays and Fridays are usually great when she is home. Then Saturdays and Sundays are a little less predictable because she is well-rested, then the process starts all over. The new 4-hour schedule has messed with our dinnertime a bit, as she is zombie-like after school and requires a lot of attention right when we need to get dinner on the table. When Ellen was a baby, I would just put her down and then Erik and I would eat later. Now, we need to feed Ellen and then start the bedtime charade, so there is no time to eat later. Oh well - just another transition. When she is really sitting up and eating some finger foods in a few months, I think we'll be good.

Speaking of finger foods - I'm flying with Georgia next week solo on a trip to visit my girlfriends. I've flown with Ellen solo, but always had food and toys to keep her entertained. Not this time ... send your happy-flying-baby vibes this way, s'il vous plait.

And, per usual, a few more things I've been reading. Do you like this and/or find it interesting?
The Ringya App via Cool Mom Tech - organize groups of school/sports contacts easily
Helicopter Parents are Everywhere, Except Where They're Needed Most - an interesting column on child and car seat safety in response to a viral kid video
A good response to the Victoria's Secret tween-undie scandal via Mom101 -  and, can I say, SOOO not looking forward to the teenage girl years
Why Suckable Fruit Sucks - interesting commentary on a generation of children who eat much of their food from pouches
Related, from Dinner: A Love Story - How to talk to your kids about healthy eating -  I like the "sometimes food" description
And another from them, Dinner: A Love Story - 100 Rules of Dinner

And, finally, I liked this column by Erin Loechner on being a first time mom and creating a baby registry. I have a similar feeling when I read back through early entries on this blog looking to see how I did things the first time. I hope it didn't come across as preachy and know-it-all, but maybe it did. It seems that way to me, at least, a lot of the time. I just think there is something about being a first-time parent and trying to figure it all out (as if it's even realistic to think you can) and for me it was  helpful to process things by writing. If anyone else benefited, even better. So ... thanks for "listening" back then. And still.

Some more stuff

Georgia is totally entering the stage of being distracted while eating, which means we are getting back to 'all hands on deck' for feedings. I bet she popped on and off about 25 times last night, just checking if I was still there. Yep, still here. Before she started with this, I came across a few snippets here and there I thought were worth sharing ...

Rage Against the Minivan: Let's Bring Holidays Down a Notch - I came across this on Facebook and completely agree. The holiday celebrating, and especially the situations requiring candy, are way way over the top. I admit I felt a twinge of guilt about not doing anything for St. Patrick's Day since it was on a weekend this year, then I quickly got over it. We didn't even wear green! We have had some big Easter gifts the past few years, mostly as compensation for a too-close birthday and Christmas, but this year will be much more low key. I finally wised up and got some little tiny toys / play food to go in the easter eggs instead of all candy. Coins are also especially motivating this year.

New York Times: The Stories that Bind Us - Interesting read about how children cope better if they feel that they know and are part of a family narrative. I think a daily family meal is a good time to share some of these things, though we really aren't there yet. We are still mostly in the "sit still and face your plate and stop talking so much" phase of family dinner. Also, on a related/unrelated note, Ellen's teachers tell me it is hysterical to watch her talk about food with her classmates. As I put on Facebook, she asked recently if they were having an arugula salad for lunch. She was inquiring last night about the differences between quinoa and polenta. Love my good little eater!

And, related to eating, Wall Street Journal: Food Allergy Advice for Kids, Don't Delay Peanuts, Eggs. I found the journal article this was based on (nerd) and talked it over with my pediatrician brother-in-law. I wasn't too hyper with this kind of thing with Ellen, but I probably did wait close to 12 months for those "target foods". I will introduce them earlier with Georgia, I think. I really don't think she is ready for solids yet - not showing interest, not sitting up really strongly - and it's a total pain in the ass to start on solids, if I'm being honest. I think we will do a little bit more of the "baby-led weaning" idea of feeding baby what the rest of the family is eating, as her dinner time will be the same as ours! I'm also kind of excited about the reusable pouches they have now - it's amazing how much has changed with baby feeding in just 4 years (most of which I think is a gimmick, actually, but there are a few handy inventions).

Gear, take two

It's probably quite obvious that I don't have much time to write here. Or, really, not much of use to write about! The novelty of being a first-time mom has worn off, so I feel that much of what we are up to is familiar. I tried to keep the new baby purchases to a minimum - even easier since we can re-use all the "girl" things, but there are a few new things I'm loving that I thought I would share.

I ordered this Baby Cargo Georgi Stroller Bag not long after we got home from the hospital. (Could the name be more perfect?) I got mine at Diapers.com, but seems that it is cheapest at Target right now. It is a good size and has plenty of pockets. Doesn't hold a ton of stuff (not as much as the backpack I used with Ellen), but works as a messenger-style purse and I think will be great on the MacLaren when we get to using it. I even saw that the gals at Ain't No Mom Jeans use it from time to time, so then I felt reasonably stylish. :)

This Conair Sound Therapy and Relaxation Clock Radio kills two birds with one stone - noise machine and clock for nursing. In Ellen's room we had a digital clock plus used our iPod and docking station for ocean noise (ridiculously expensive noise machine). This isn't the greatest clock ever, but is fine for the price.

The Nose Frida snot sucker is flat out amazing. Get it, along with extra filters.

I already told you that I like the Rumina Full Coverage pumping / nursing tank, but I continue to really like it. It has more support than my previous favorite tanks, the Gilligan O'Malley Target ones. I still like the Target ones for sleeping and hanging around the house - more comfy, and cheaper!

We added a few of these Halo Sleepsack Swaddles in cotton to our pile of swaddling items. Last time we used the Kiddopotamus SwaddleMe with good success, but I think this go-round their velcro was kind of worn out and Georgia could bust out of them pretty easily. I found that the cotton ones worked best - most stretchy and tight, but had to be washed frequently to keep their tightness. This sleepsack swaddle was kind of easy for Georgia to get out of in full swaddle mode, but the ability to swaddle one arm or no arms seemed to work great for us. We used it to wean from the swaddling with no issues. The newborn size is pretty short and she grew out of it rather quickly and isn't all that long of a baby, so now we use the small size.

This Fisher Price Cradle n' Swing was borrowed from a friend both times - different friends, same swing. It was a lifesaver both times. I guess you'll never know if your baby will like it, but it would have been a worthwhile investment. Hooray for generous friends! This version also plugs in, which is nice.

 And a few other things ...
- Some kind of bouncy chair, just very basic. We were gifted a MacLaren version that isn't made anymore, but it is similar to the Baby Bjorn Babysitter, just much less expensive. I just wanted a seat that would prop Georgia up while we were eating or whatever, and it has worked great for that purpose.We never had one with Ellen for some reason.
- Georgia practically lives in these Tea Collection Footies. They are a great weight for cold weather babies and wash and wear so well. I got several on major sale -they have great sales if you subscribe to their emails.
- I've commented on this before, but we opted to purchase a nebulizer machine through our pediatrician after Ellen needed it for the second time with a wheezing respiratory illness as a toddler. It has turned out to be so useful - we have albuterol on hand and can use it for both girls. We've unfortunately needed it a lot, but it saves us an urgent trip to the doctor on a weekend or whatever. So, if you need it once, buy one!
- Not to toot my own horn, but this blog has been so useful for me. I'm not saying it will be so useful for you, but the ability to look back at what I did with the first child has been great. I invariably find myself saying, "Ellen never did this!" (yes she did), or "how did we ever make this work?". It's so nice to see what we did. Not that Georgia is the same child, of course, but it's a good record. If you have your first child, I encourage you to take notes about those mundane things - it might come in handy!

And, some good old favorites that are worth their weight in gold: Medela Freestyle Pump (did you know that breastpumps are now covered under the Affordable Care Act?), Boppy, Gerber Nuk pacifiers, and Exersaucer (equivalent of this Triple Fun version - love the removable toy bar for younger babies).

Anything I'm missing?

By the by, I think there are more than 3 people who read this (my sister, mother and mother-in-law), so if you do, say hello!

Confidence

There were so many questions I had about how our life would change with child #2. Most of my friends with more than one kid would say that, yes, many things were more challenging, but also many things were more enjoyable because you had confidence in your parenting skills. I am finding that to be true, thankfully.

Not that we haven't had our struggles. We have, and continue to. (Example: up 4 times last night with a 4:45am feeding - ugh). In some ways, I also think parental confidence contributes to my frustration, mostly in the middle of the night. I'm anxious to get past this phase as I know the sweetness that is a child who sleeps for 11-12 hours. The first go round I didn't know any better!

I can read Georgia's cues better that I could with Ellen and I have the confidence to make more decisions on my own that seem right for our family rather than doing everything by the book. Our first week back to school/work was a crappy one due to a nasty viral illness, but before that I really thought Georgia was showing signs of dropping a feeding. I was generally waking her for all her feedings and she was starting to eat poorly at her last feeding because I think we were disrupting her sleep. Also, I wanted her to get in bed sooner so everyone else could go to sleep. Some of my books say that kids will start to go to 5 feedings around 13-14 weeks, though I don't think we did it with Ellen until like 18 weeks. Georgia's sickness derailed my plan in some ways, but also her appetite was poor and she was refusing to eat, thus dropping a feeding on her own. Instead of forcing the issue, I decided to go with it. The first couple of days were kind of rough and I emailed a friend for support to make sure I wasn't being crazy, but then it all just sorted itself out. I just kept telling myself - what is the WORST thing that could happen? Feeding her during the night? That's not so bad. (I did do that for 2 nights, then that was it). Also, if all else fails, you can revert to the old schedule. Her new schedule is much better for our school/work days, so I just made it work. There will come a time when our schedule as parents must revolve around the kid schedule, but now is not that time.

I've also been emailing with my cousin who is expecting her first child in the very near future. I generally walk a fine line between providing a lot of information about my experience and scaring the bejeezus out of people. I was telling her all about pumping, thus prompting me to look back at what I did with Ellen. I pumped WAY more with Ellen, mostly because I was afraid to stop for fear of a plummeting milk supply. I find that there just isn't a ton of info about how to fit pumping into your breastfeeding life if you are working full or part-time. I threw away tons and tons of milk with Ellen and still had like a 2 month supply in my freezer after I weaned her. I felt like I spent all of my time on "milk maintenance". This time, I clearly had the benefit of knowing that I would more than likely have a generous milk supply, so I've tried to do things to make sure I have adequate, but not excessive, milk for Georgia. With Ellen, I would feed her on one side and then pump - every morning for 9 months. I could have been sleeping!! I did this for awhile with Georgia, then just decided to feed her on both sides and I weaned off that morning pumping recently. Saves probably 10 minutes each morning, which is precious. Also, since I dropped a feeding, I only have to pump twice at work, another big time saver. I nurse her when she wakes up and pretty soon after we get home, then again before bed. She rarely refuses to eat on a side, but if she does I don't worry about it. With Ellen, I would have pumped. I've saved a lot of time and frustration ... and freezer space.

All good things must come to an end

I was thinking about that quote yesterday ... and why, really, must all good things come to an end? So you can appreciate the next good thing? I'm pretty happy with what I've got going on right now, alas, can't hold on any longer. Today is my last solo day home with Georgia for, oh, the rest of my life. I love this quiet baby time. She is such a sweet, good baby and SO easy now. (Well, now that she is sleeping). I know that this, too, will end and she will become more energetic and opinionated and fun - and I look forward to that for sure - but this sweet sleepy baby stage is just awesome. (Not the newborn stage, just to make the distinction).

Georgia's school bag is packed and all of the "camp list" of items has been shipped off to a box under her crib at school. They can't swaddle babies any longer, so I'm also sending her teachers good wishes because it's going to be rough. Little G hasn't napped or slept un-swaddled in probably 2 months. If you look at the bright side, it appears we are farming out the "break the swaddle" training, which is nice. If you look on the dark side, though, I am pretty certain I will be picking up an exhausted baby from daycare all next week who won't eat and will be sleeping like a crazy person at home. In fact, send some good wishes our way, too, if you don't mind.

I'm remembering how un-fun it is to pump at work all day, but I've got all my supplies prepped and ready. I'm currently trying to formulate the best way for me to wake / shower / feed / do hair / do make-up / get dressed / pump / grab coffee / grab breakfast / kiss my loved ones goodbye every morning. I'm tempted to use a stop watch to see just how long each task takes, but I will try to resist. I did order the Rumina Hands-Free Pump&Nurse tank and so far really like it. It's an investment, for sure, but they do have a sale right now and free shipping through the end of the month. I ordered the full-coverage version so I could wear it solo under a cardigan or something and I think it covers enough to be work appropriate. I used their measuring guidelines and the size on the corresponding chart was just right. It is kind of cumbersome to get your pump parts to fit in the tank, or at least takes a little practice, but I did it one morning while brushing my teeth and putting on make-up and it worked perfectly. Huge time saver for me. Will be ordering two more ...

Sweet G also has a cold this week, shared by her loving sister, so I'm hopeful she won't get hit AGAIN when she starts school next week. Yeah, right. She is incredibly snorty and stuffy, but no fever and otherwise happy. I forgot that I had purchased the Nosefrida Snotsucker in a fit of nesting several months ago. Pulled it out today and it is AWESOME. So much more effective than the bulb syringe.

And, finally, came across this article last night while perusing my phone and pumping ... That Baby Wants to Break You Up. I can't say that I ever felt things were this extreme in our household, but the newborn stage is no joke and this summed up some of my feelings. Sleep deprivation is terrible and I can now look back and see that I've been pretty freaking tired for the last 4-5 months, with a several week period of serious lack of sleep thrown in the middle just for kicks. It is hard and makes me a difficult person to be around. Our mornings and evenings are finally pretty pleasant again and I seem to be hitting my stride during my days home with both girls. I'm much more patient and Ellen seems more calm. I will say that the silver lining of having a non-napping older child is that I can dictate when her "quiet time" begins - i.e. it starts the minute I put Georgia down for her nap. Now that Georgia's schedule is pretty predictable I have finally figured this out and it gets me (most of) an hour to myself each afternoon. Essential.

Wah wah

We went through the exercise of setting up our will / trust / power of attorney documents when Ellen was about 10 months old and we were about to (both) leave on a plane to Hawaii. On our list of things to do is updating those documents to reflect the addition of Georgia (something I don't think my parents did until my younger sister was, oh, about 21-years-old). In a "the truth really is stranger than fiction" kind of way, our original lawyer is not currently practicing due to a murder charge, so we are looking for a new lawyer. Suggestions?

I came across this blog on Twitter and thought it was worth passing along. I haven't explored it all, but seems worthwhile and a good reminder if nothing else.

Get Your Shit Together - written by a woman whose husband died suddenly detailing the documents she wished she had

Links for you

I have a lot of time to read, but turns out, not so much time to think or write. Though, I am reading less in the middle of the night during feedings - hooray!

So, here are some articles that I thought were worth sharing ...

Hair Day via The Hairpin - the honestly made me laugh out loud and I am not much of a LOL-type person

7 New Mom Essentials I Never Knew I Needed - I second her thoughts on lanolin and nursing tanks and I need to get me some concealer. I have not yet mastered reading actual books as she does ...

On Advice To Kids via The Awl - nice piece written by a gal who (it seems) doesn't have children, but portrays kids and parents very honestly. I especially liked this advice: "That sometimes not only you, but every other single person you might look to, has absolutely no idea what to do. No one."

Coping with Sleep Deprivation via The Happiest Mom -  For sure, the sleep deprivation this time around was the very most challenging thing we faced with Georgia. And, she is a good sleeper! I just totally forgot what it was like to be in a daze all the time and it made me more grouchy and less patient at the worst possible time. And I agree with her sentiments on "sleep when the baby sleeps" - easier said than done.

How I stopped worrying and learned to love The American Girl Doll  via Mom101 - very timely for us as Ellen is obsessed. I still think she is a little young for one of these dolls, but will likely get one some day. Nice perspective here.

You don't need my permission, but you have it anyway via Rookie Moms - like the sentiment here, especially because Georgia was taking ALL of her naps in her swing. It started out that she would nap in her boppy or vibrating chair or swing. She was sometimes swaddled, sometimes not. Sometimes swinging, sometimes not. Then eventually it became swaddle-swing-sleep and it worked well for us because it was easy. She slept fine in her bed at night so I wasn't too worried, but it still seemed like something I shouldn't be doing. But, you know what? You do what you have to do. She is now taking most of her daily naps in her bed and there was no transition issue - phew.

Breastfeeding, take 2

Sporadic posting, I know. That really is What I've Learned So Far ... no time for things like this!

I did want to take some time to note my experience with breastfeeding this time around because it was one of the things I was nervous about with baby girl #2. I nursed Ellen for 10 months and I'm pretty sure we had the typical course ... major learning curve at the beginning, figured it out by about 1 month, and then coasted pretty smoothly (with an over-abundant milk supply) to 10 months when I weaned her before a vacation and she was majorly distractable / disinterested.

Despite all that, it was seriously a distant memory and I could hardly fathom doing it again. I dug out my pump (the Medela Freestyle - still convinced it's the best thing around) and found that all my old pump parts were pretty grody. I was planning to order replacements, but that sealed the deal. I guess the old style of breast shields (the Soft Fit) didn't hold up over time, so they aren't available now. I ordered replacements and they come in sizes - I started with the 24mm (standard) and moved up to the 27mm after my milk came in. I have 2 full sets of parts and will have 3 when I go back to work to avoid so much sanitizing and drying during the work day. I also got replacement tubing, just because, I guess. I had everything sanitized and ready at home before I left for the hospital.

The day before I delivered I was looking up breastfeeding videos on YouTube (lame), but I didn't really even remember the terminology and such and needed a little refresher. Lansinoh had a decent video that was protected under like 3 warnings about being age 18 or older - really?

I don't remember much about the hospital days of breastfeeding with Ellen, other than the fact that she was SO SO sleepy that we spent most of her feeds trying to wake her up. I think she was latching well, though, and hadn't lost too much weight when we went home.

This time was different - Georgia didn't latch well at all and kept her tongue at the roof of her mouth. She wasn't tongue tied or anything, just more of a general disinterest in eating. I felt much more comfortable with the nurses and lactation consultants trying to help me, and I felt more confidant in what I was doing (it really is like riding a bike ...) and they all acknowledged that I was doing everything correctly, but that she was just difficult. It was super frustrating, even with my knowledge base, and I'm glad she was #2 instead of #1. I ended up using the hospital pump and pumping after trying to nurse, then giving her colostrum through a syringe on my finger or in her mouth while she was nursing. It was super annoying and very difficult to do by myself and I couldn't see how this would translate to us going home.

Over our 3 days in the hospital she showed VERY SLOW progress, to the point where we all felt comfortable going home and following up with a weight check the next day. Her best feeding was right before we left the hospital and then her weight check the next day was promising. She continued to nurse better with each feeding and by about day 5 she was totally fine - no more tube feedings or any assistance. One of the lactation consultants commented that when she had her babies (25+ years ago), no one expected breastfed babies to eat very well for the first 3 days. Now we get in a panic about it, when I think it just takes time for some babies to wake up and show interest. That certainly seemed to be the case for Georgia (fortunately).

From that point her weight gain was great and I even thought she was a better / more relaxed / possibly more efficient feeder than Ellen. She was eating 7 times in 24 hours and I was able to read or check email on my phone while she nursed, which I could never do with Ellen (needed all hands on deck). Then fast forward about 3 weeks and I had searing, toe-curling pain when she latched on. I was afraid it might be a yeast infection or something, but when I assessed the situation I realized it was just a lazy latch. She was getting milk, but wasn't latching well and I was paying the price. I did quite a bit of reading and even watched some videos (Jack Newman's site is good) of a good latch to really get a picture of what I was aiming for. I worked hard for a few days to improve her latch, which was successful, and it has been smooth sailing since then. So, in the end, it really was about 1 month until everything seemed easy for both of us.

Some tips I have learned this time around:
- Use lanolin (or a comparable product) EVERY TIME you nurse or pump. I started in the hospital and have been diligent and I haven't had any cracks or bleeding.
- Have some smallish ice packs on hand and frozen for when you come home from the hospital. When your milk comes in you will be happy you have them (cold is better than hot - that just adds to the inflammation). I would wear my nursing tank, then a zip up jacket on top to hold the ice bags in place.
- I pumped much more this time when my milk came in, which I think helped matters. With Ellen I think I was afraid to pump too much for fear it would just produce more milk. This time I bet I pumped 4 or 5 times the first day, and 2 or 3 times the second day, in addition to feeds until my breasts felt soft(er). By the 3rd day I think I was pretty much back to just the regular feeding schedule.
- While you are doing all that pumping, just save your pump parts in the fridge in a ziploc bag so you aren't constantly sterilizing and drying parts and use them as needed.  It should be fine for 12-24 hours.
- We are still using the little Medela regular neck bottles that fit on the pump for Georgia's bottles. She takes them just fine (gave her first bottle around 3-4 weeks, no issue). I sterilized all the bottles and caps and rings before we left for the hospital and bought new slow flow nipples. Nipples for regular neck bottles are almost impossible to find anymore, just FYI. I don't even think Medela makes them - I used the Green To Grow ones.
- I still pump at least once a day (usually last feeding of the day when she gets a bottle from Dad) and sometimes twice (early morning after first feed now that she is mostly sleeping through the night).
- I am on the hunt for a good hands-free pumping situation that might allow for me to get ready for work in the mornings while pumping. I have read good things about the Rumina tank and may splurge.

Random thoughts

It's amazing what you come across at 2:47am while you're perusing all of the internet on your phone. 



The Car Seat Lady explains the new American Academy of Pediatrics Car Seat Recommendations

Why I don't bake from scratch (but think it's awesome if you do)

We finally got all the Christmas decorations up. And by "we" I mean me and my sister who I guilted into helping me. It was on my to-do list for 5 days and I just finally felt that it was now or never and I put up the easy stuff and called it good. I even contemplated doing something different with the Christmas tree - something easy and simple - but I couldn't get to the store or spend any time on a DIY project, so the standard stuff had to suffice. It's fine. It's good enough (see article above).

As much as I love Pinterest and wasting my brain cells reading blogs, I must say that this season I have felt like maybe all of this stuff is a double edged sword. I like the inspiration, but dislike the standard it sets. I like doing crafty and creative things, but don't like feeling like my thoughts aren't original anymore. I like celebrating, but don't like the guilt that seeps in when the birthday party for a small child isn't "perfect" or your Christmas decorations are the same you've had for forever. And The Elf? Don't even get me started ... perhaps I would be happier with Nicholas if I didn't have a newborn to contend with.

I'm trying my hardest to slow down and enjoy this season with Ellen, but the days are just merging together. There has been an endless parade of gifts for her entering our house - big sister gifts, birthday gifts, and Christmas is starting to trickle in. Every one of them thoughtful and enjoyed, but a 4-year-old faced with weekly gifts becomes a bit greedy. I suppose we all would if we had gifts to open every week.

I'm just trying to pick my battles, trying to have patience when it's in short supply, and trying to make memories of our Christmas this year. Not gonna lie, though ... January 2nd is looking really good.

She's Four!

My dearest Ellen (poodle, button, sister bear ...),

Happiest 4th Birthday To You!

What a year this has been! It has been a delight watching you grow into a real person - leaving most of the baby behind and, at times, seeming wise and/or mature beyond your years. Last year was marked by the upheaval of moving, and this year was marked by the upheaval of a pregnant mother and new baby sister. You met both challenges with grace - a quality I hope you will always have.

You continue to be funny and surprising and sometimes surprisingly funny. You can almost always get a smile or giggle from your parents, even at an inappropriate time (i.e. 9:45pm), but your timing is impeccable - we generally are in desperate need of a giggle and you seem to sense that.

You are caring and kind, sometimes to a fault. It is hard to watch you and your little friends bicker and it is tough to see you have your feelings hurt, though it is a part of life. I hope we can teach you to roll with the punches and to be your own person.

You are smart and inquisitive and I love seeing how your mind works. You ask insightful questions about life and death and nature and people. I hope you continue to ask us questions and I hope we are smart enough to give you good answers.

You are creative and artistic and it has been so fun to watch your skills develop over the least year. You could scratch out your name when you turned 3, but have become so much more confidant in writing and recognizing your letters.You like to look at books and objects and copy the letters, ever so precisely. You spend much of each day coloring and it has been amazing to see the transformation from scribbles to coloring in the lines and drawing people and families.


Finally, you are a Big Sister. You cherish the title and it warms my heart to see you interact with Georgia. You have been nothing but sweet to her and, while I know it won't always be this way, I hope she is as much a gift to you this year as you are to her.

I love you to pieces, my favorite Big Girl.
Mom

Hospital List / First days home

There a lot of different sources on hospital lists for mom / baby. I kind of obsessed over our list the first time, then never really packed a bag, and honestly can't remember what we cobbled together to bring to the hospital. Whatever it was, it was fine.

This time, it felt like a different experience because I knew the date and time we would be arriving at the hospital (most likely) and I knew there wouldn't be any labor and delivery time and that I would be recovering from a c-section. So, perhaps a little different ...

In case you care, here is what my list included for a repeat c-section, with some notes about the ultimate usefulness of these items:

Bag for Baby
Bag for Dad / Significant Other
Bag for Mom
(lots of bags, but helpful to have stuff separate and easy to find / bring in from the car when needed. Also, stuff accumulates at the hospital - good to have extra packing room coming home.)

Baby:
Two cute swaddling blankets (never used)
Going home outfit (brought a preemie outfit and a 0-3 month. Ended up with preemie choice for a 7lb baby)
Couple of kimono style shirts and pants (never used)
Baby hats (never used, just used hospital provided)
Boppy (left in the car, never ended up bringing it in)
Breast pump (had ready at home just in case. Ended up using hospital grade pump and a kit of parts they provided)
Gift from baby to older sibling(s) if you want
So ... sounds like baby doesn't need a bag.

Dad / Significant Other:
Whatever he throws in!
Changes of clothes, toiletries, extra charger(s)
Extra pillows for mom and dad with patterned pillow cases to keep separate from hospital

Mom:
Plastic folder / envelope for papers (super helpful. Brought insurance paperwork, hospital directions, copy of advanced directive. Placed all the various paperwork that accumulates during the hospital in one place to bring home)
Robe (didn't use. I'm not a robe person and didn't start now)
No-skid socks (didn't use, had flip flops instead)
Nursing tanks / bras, breast pads (used all of the above - brought Large tanks, could have used XL to account for engorgement. Got lanolin from lactation consultant)
PJ pants, nursing tops with short and long sleeves (I wore my own clothes on day 2 after I showered, was nice to have short and long sleeve options depending on room temp)
Toiletries (lip balm, good smelling travel shampoo, spare toothbrush and toothpaste, hairbands / headbands, extra contacts/glasses/eyedrops, face cleaner wipes). I had packed with spares of most everything and threw in a few essentials at the end. The face cleaner wipes were so nice when I couldn't get out of bed. Wish I brought hand lotion and a small mirror.
Makeup (never used)
Gum - may help with digestion / gas
Going home outfit - just wore the same thing I put on the morning we came to the hospital. Comfy and black, seemed slimming, though not so much.
Underwear and pads - I made sure to get undies that came up over my incision and brought my own thinner pads
Camera / chargers / batteries (we just ended up using our iPhones, so easy! We had 2 chargers, which were in frequent use. Plugs aren't all that convenient in hospital rooms - I read somewhere about bringing a short extension cord, which we didn't do, but you could)

Ahead of time:
Get a pedicure / manicure (I almost never treat myself to this, but it was nice to have pretty  hands and feet when the rest was, well, not so pretty)
Put a waterproof crib pad under the sheets on your side of the bed in case your water breaks
Treats for the nurses - 2 batches for day and night shifts. If it's homemade, bring the recipe! We had awesome nurses and the first time we gave them some cookies before we left, but it's nice to have the ability to plan ahead to bring something. They all commented on how nice it was and I'm sure we would have had great care anyway, but it's nice little insurance. :)
Baby-tracker app for phone. I was an obsessive note-taker with Ellen and now I use the "Eat Sleep" app for iPhone and it fulfills all my note-taking desires. :)
Baby books - read up on sleeping or feeding or whatever it is that you've gathered. I always think I'll have time after baby is born, but it quickly falls to the bottom of the priority list. I have a lot of books, but this time around I skimmed Baby Wise and The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems.
Check on your vaccines, especially for fall / winter babies: flu shot for everyone who will be around baby regularly and TDAP booster if you need it.  

Things to have on hand at home:
Since you won't be getting out anytime soon, grab these things before you deliver:
Slippers to have at home if you don't have any
Some zip up or button up tops that are big enough - just got a few fleece jackets from Old Navy
Extra lanolin - one tube for upstairs and one for downstairs if you need it. Use it EVERY time you nurse / pump
Extra pump parts - have everything on hand and sanitized, including bottles. I pumped much earlier this time than the first time and it was nice to have everything ready to go
Milk bags for freezer if you are breastfeeding (in case you pump - hang on to that stuff!). I think Lansinoh are easiest to use. 
Vitamin D drops for baby - recommended if breastfeeding
Pump hand sanitizer in any room you think you'll need it. I'm not generally a germaphobe, but I am with a newborn in RSV / flu season
Gas X for mom - I don't remember this from last time, but my gas pains in the hospital and at home are almost as bad as my incision pain. Tums / antacids won't work.
Miralax if things aren't, ummm,  moving (especially if you are taking pain meds)
Pacifiers if you think you'll use them, perhaps a few types (see my pacifier try-out post here). Ellen always liked the Nuk, but started out with the green Soothies pacifier from the hospital. We never got one (or even saw one) this time, and I had the Gumdrops pacifiers at home, which Georgia prefers.
Some kind of swaddle system - blanket / Kiddopotamous SwaddleMe (what we use) / Miracle blanket (have heard great things). I feel confidant swaddling with a blanket in the daytime, but I get nervous that blankets will get loose overnight.

Be aware:
My hands, wrists and feet were CRAZY swollen. I don't remember this the first time, but I also didn't get so many fluids prior to surgery because it was semi-emergency. My doctor suggested it's those first few bags of fluid you hang on to for a while.
If you have carpal tunnel in your pregnancy, it lingers for awhile. Like, almost 3 weeks later, my fingertips are still numb. 

Screeching halt

I feel like about 17 days ago my life came to a screeching halt. For the best reason, of course, but a serious 180 degree turnabout in my schedule.

I am a person who likes to keep busy. Not in the work-out kind of way (but, damn, that would be useful), but rather I feel like I need to keep my hands and my mind busy. I always have some type of "project" that I'm working on.

Pregnancy and nesting exacerbated this in a serious way ... I wasn't sleeping well, so I was up early. I had lots of time to work on stuff. My almost 4-year-old was pretty independent and generally willing to run errands, so we had busy "home days". I completed virtually everything on my to-do list and felt pretty accomplished.

Fast forward to having an extra child, who isn't super easy to run-around with, and no sort of daily schedule and it all feels kind of strange. I'm not waking up at any specific time and when I do, I'm zombie-ish. Sometimes my first cup of coffee is at 9 or 10am and I feel like my day starts around lunchtime, which kind of feels awful. I don't remember this with Ellen, and perhaps it was because I was adjusting so much to just having a baby around. Now I feel much more confidant with the baby, leaving me feeling like I should be accomplishing more.

It's ridiculous, I know. Keeping my girls fed and happy and healthy is my most important task, always at the top of my to-do list. I just felt it was worth sharing that this was an unexpected adjustment with child #2 ...

So, you may find that I post more here about "new mom" things, or at least "second time mom things" and you may wonder why I'm spending my time on this. One, I hope it's helpful to someone else (you know I love to research things and I always find other people's opinions helpful). But two, and just as important right now, it gives me a "project" - something quick and simple and it's preserving my sanity.

So, for that, thanks.

Baby girl

I've always hoped for two children. While Ellen fit our family perfectly, I always wished that she would get to experience having a sibling. As it goes, we were so busy with her toddler-hood that I was never sure when or if another baby would fit in. As a planner (no, PLANNER), I thought I could pretty much control how this would all work out. My first lesson in being a parent of two is that "planning" and "control" are laughable. Celebrating holidays with Ellen has been beyond fun, but as we near the Christmas season, I must admit that I always felt a tiny pang of longing. I didn't buy stockings because I wanted there to be two matching ones. I couldn't wait for siblings in Christmas jammies. It should come as no surprise that those two things were tops on my To-Do list after bringing Georgia home. I'm happy, thankful (so thankful), and feel like our family is finally exactly as it was meant to be.

I summarized my first pregnancy here, so same story, second verse:

Hoping, wishing, waiting. Waiting, waiting, waiting and waiting some more. Pssst - it's positive. A huge smile on the inside, a cautious smile on the outside. Feeling good, then not-so-good, then pretty good again. Ultrasound 1, 2, 3 .... 8. Everything looking as it should - still nervous. Good looking nuchal, frankly scary-looking 3D ultrasound. We're having another baby! (Shhh ... Ellen doesn't know). It's a boy, right? It's gotta be a boy. "Mama - I'm ess-ited about your baby"- heartbroken, then so happy to share the news with a happy big sister (who ordered a girl baby). Cupcake bows and Spiderman bows. Surprise ... it's a .... GIRL! Serious sweet tooth - gummy candy extravaganza and homemade s'mores. Nightly. Haven't gained as much weight as the first time, until, 8 pounds in 1 month? I'm sure the scale was broken. Sciatica. Tired - OH SO TIRED. Growth looking good? Well, not so much. Moderate panic - nest, nest, nest. Oh, kidding, she looks just fine - fat around her belly (takes after her mother). Feeling good again, develop a plan to stock the freezer. To the gills. Time to do laundry - where did all these blankets and burp cloths come from? Are 25 pairs of tiny socks enough? The closets are clean, the house is clean, the freezer is full. Will she wait? Not a contraction in sight. Pass time with my feet up on the couch. Halloween distraction. Please no Halloween birthday. Goodnight sweet Ellen, when we see you again you will be a big sister. No big deal, just waking up at 4:45am to have a baby. It's calm, casual, breezy - so different from the first time. Waiting, waiting, waiting again to see your sweet face. "What a beautiful round head! And, so much hair!" Here she is ... looking just like Ellen! A quick cry, then quiet - my sweet, patient girl taking it all in. We all were. Happy beyond belief. Relief beyond belief. The new normal - life as FOUR.