Take note!

Do you have some system for keeping track of the perfectly darling and/or amusing things your child says on a daily basis?

I'm really not that organized. But - I would like to be.

I sometimes note things on our family blog. And, I do keep a baby book for Ellen that I write in every now and then, but I always forget the best little quotes. Sometimes I'll text them to her Dad and I can retrieve them from my phone.

I recently started an "Ellen-isms" page in the little notebook I carry around in my purse for random notes ... it never fails that she blurts out something hilarious on our way to the grocery store.

Today I came across this free Quote Book download for organizing the funnies in a cute way at Kinderpendent (via Cool Mom Picks). A cute xmas gift for a new mom in your life, perhaps?

I think you could also make it something as simple as a perpetual calendar that you use to note kid-isms, or even a box of index cards you keep in your kitchen to collect the stories. I love reading the baby book my mom kept for me (thanks Mom! and, hooray for being the 1st child!) and these funny little things are so precious now that I have my own funny little thing living with me.

(And today - so timely! - a similar idea for a 2012 Best of My Days Notepad from Ashley at Under the Sycamore.)

In case you were wondering, the best of late ...
"It's not a secret. It's a tell thing."
"This fizzy water is pokey in my mouth."
"Are there any golfclubbers out today?" (such a better name than golfer)
"I don't have enough fingers. Just about 8. I want more. And purple ones."
"Can we work on a hug project today??"

Your Santa?

When Santa visited my childhood home, we had lots of unwrapped gifts, displayed perfectly. He was very generous!

When Santa visits our house now, he does pretty much the same thing.

What happens when Santa visits your house?

I saw this post on Design Mom and it made me start thinking about Christmas Morning. I feel like this Christmas with a 3-year-old will be the start of something memorable and a good age to add some traditions. If we ever have another child, it would be nice to have some established guidelines rather than the general gift-free-for-all approach that we have been using.

Does Santa follow some rules when he comes down your chimney?

File this one away

Have your kids really entered the baby doll phase? Ells plays with babies here and there, and talks about her babies a lot, but kind of treats her dolls/bunnies/bears/dogs all the same. She hasn't gotten into feeding / changing / napping babies yet, but I think the day is coming.

I saw this Corolle baby today on Cool Mom Picks. Pricey, but I LOVE the idea of using your own sweet baby clothes for dress up.



How does this compare to American Girl dolls? I'm honestly trying to avoid that place as.long.as.possible.

Got yourself a boy?

They don't seem so much different than girls and, then again, they seem totally different.

Maybe you'll like this blog I just came across if you have the XY variety in your house ...

Frog and Snail Society

Click! take a pic ...

(Diego anyone??)

Here is a good description of Intro to DSLR Cameras by Ashley at Under the Sycamore. As I've said before, I love her photography approach, especially when it comes to her young kids.

Maybe you can share with Santa for his list??

This is fun

You can download a free kids' album of music HERE: Original Friend by Lunch Money. They are a Grammy-nominated band and, I guess, sharing the fun!

I found them via Design Mom and she has a fun interview with Mo Willems today - love his books!

In the bag

Serious business today.

I need advice.

What kind of purse are you carrying these days??

I am finding myself in this strange period of not needing a diaper bag, yet needing both of my hands (and sometimes a 3rd hand) for child wrangling. I used the backpack with great success, and still do for long outings (zoo and such), but I just don't need it to run to Target.

I was gifted a very nice purse that I have used everyday for 2 years, yet it fell victim to the house renovations and has a big splotch of paint on the side. (Which pretty much just explains my life these days). The problem, though, is that it just goes over my shoulder like a normal purse, but doesn't stay on said shoulder when I am lunging for a child, or carrying 2 grocery bags and a child, or wrestling with a child in the freezer aisle.

I am definitely a 'purse' girl .. not in the sense that I care about labels or price (I'm cheap), but I carry a lot of things that seem necessary to me and I just can't swing the big wallet approach.

I was thinking a messenger / cross-body style? Or something with an option for messenger style? I don't want it to be too sporty looking. And, I need some kind of compartments inside - a huge tote bag is just a bottomless pit to lose things for me.

Suggestions? Tips? Pointers?

I'm all ears.

It's a little late

Do you all have a Halloween candy policy? It occurred to me, at our 3rd trick-or-treating stop, that perhaps we should have discussed this in advance.

Last year Ells didn't really notice what happened to the candy ... she liked to sort it all out, and had a few bites, but didn't really notice when it went into the cabinet and never came back out.

This year? Never gonna work. She literally told her grandfather, "Don't even think about it!" when he playfully tried to take some of her candy. She has a definite mental inventory of every piece in her bag. (She grudgingly allowed me to take away the worst offender in the 'choking hazard' category and she told her grandfather that the green candies 'weren't vegetables.')

She generally responds well to lots of priming ... if we talk about things for a few days in advance she behaves well and/or complies. Pretty much. Can I spring a new Halloween candy rule at this point?

Our nephew trades his candy in for a toy of his choosing, which I think works really well for them. I don't think it will work well for us after the fact, but maybe next year.

I've read about kids who get to eat as much as they want for a day, then no more. I think that is just pretty disgusting for an almost-3-year-old.

A three day rule? Toss it all after that? Might work ... if I hide it, she will forget sooner or later.

Keep it all and dole it out tiny piece by piece? I usually only give her 1-2 Skittles or M&Ms at a time anyway. (She did ask me tonight if she could eat her Snickers in the spring-time. Sure! Why not?)

We also live in a great new neighborhood and she got the motherload of full-size candy bars. Hmmmm. My hips don't need those, either.

Tell me your approach to this ... please!

The Big 3

Any advice on good gifts for the 3-year-old set? Miss Priss has both a birthday AND Christmas coming up and I'm very short on ideas for gifts.

She really doesn't NEED anything, but there has to be something to open and something for the Santa list. We are at capacity on books and the most popular books lately seem to come from the library anyway. She has a play kitchen that she loves, but there are already enough accessories for a small nation. The new playroom does not have any more floor space for a 'big' gift. I was thinking about a balance bike, but it seems cruel to gift that in December when it can't be used for months.

Further, it seems that most toys are baby toys, for ages 1-2, or for 4 and up. She plays with plenty of things that are choking hazards (hooray for great parenting!), so that's not the issue, but I'm just not sure she would be interested in some of the board games and such. What age does the dress-up obsession start? I was kind of thinking of stalking the post-Halloween sales for some dress-up goodies.

I'm at a loss ....

Do as I say, not as I do

Do you all have your bookcases and dressers and such tethered to the wall? I must admit that we missed that step in our baby-proofing. Even if we had done it before, we are in a new house now and need to do it all over again.

I have commented to friends that I have had to do MORE baby proofing in the new house, which doesn't make sense, except that the house is bigger and the almost-3-year-old is sneakier and she gets into things and I can't hear or see her. Chewing on a big button because it's "gum"? Yep. Playing with big scissors? Yep. Pushing chairs over to bookshelves and reaching to get things? Yep.

In the new play room we have a tall bookcase that is VERY tippy. It makes me nervous every time I reach for something off the top shelf. Ellen always asks for help and we are always close by, but still ... something bad could happen in a second. Even worse, another child playing at our house might not be so cautious.

Read this link on The Creative Mama if you are up for it. I find that I do sad things at work and it is hard for me to read sad things in my free time, but none the less, it's a powerful reminder that accidents happen to the best families with the best of intentions. Locally, a little boy died not that many years ago in a similar accident. I even have the wall tethers packed away somewhere in the house ... no excuses.

Stick a fork in me

I'm done.

Day 4 of no-nap over here. Not for me, of course, but for the 3-foot-tall terrorist that lives in our house. Nap for me? Ha!

Why did I need her to nap so badly today? Well, there are the 3 days of sleep deprivation, of course. Also, though, the plumber is here to auger our basement main drain because our basement has standing water and floating sewage.

See?

Kill me now.

Get in the picture!

I've been working on a 2010 family photo book with My Publisher. (Yes, I'm a year behind. I'm over it). As I looked through hundreds and hundreds of pictures, I realize that I'm in only a very few. Thank goodness my sister is a good photographer, because I know she has some, but it makes me sad not to have pictures of myself interacting with Ellen, because she is the person I spend the most time with in the world!

I think I've posted a link similar to this before, but check out these tips:
Because You Were There, Too: Thirteen Tips for Family Self Portraits

Worth repeating

Though I posted this on our family blog, I consider it a public service announcement.

I made a serious error in judgement this week. I took Ells to get some new colors and she picked the Crayola Twistables Slick Stix.


Do not, I repeat, DO NOT buy these for your child. Or husband. Or self. I even knew better - I had tried to purchase them before at the Crayola store and the sales gal talked me out of it. That really sums it all up right there. They are like coloring with lipstick that stains permanently and doesn't dry. Awesome - right?

Well, I tried to talk Ellen out of it at the store and just couldn't without a scene. I let her color with permanent markers (I know - crazytown), so I thought this couldn't be worse. She has never colored on anything that she wasn't supposed to and I always supervise. Well ... the royal purple color stick slowly catapulted itself off the table and, in slow motion, I screamed NOOOOOOOO! as it hit the carpet.

I think you can guess what happened. And, it was totally my fault. After a whole lot of Googling (news flash: the Crayola "stain tips" don't really cut it), I thought I would try the good ol' Magic Eraser first. It totally worked!!

Mr. Clean, I think I love you.

Heartwarming

I haven't heard anything about this documentary, but it sounds intriguing ...

Being Elmo: A Puppeteer's Journey (click this to watch the trailer - worth the 2 minutes. Seriously.)

I guess it has won lots of awards - seems like a great story of sticking with your dreams.

(This culture today courtesy of The Observer's Very Short List. It is a daily email, if you want to sign up, of something fresh/new/undiscovered on the internets. I have found a few jems through them, things I doubt I would have stumbled upon otherwise. Doesn't everyone need MORE things to look at online??)

Oh, I get it

We had a rough week last week with Ells.

Fever for 4 days, no school all week, 3 days with grandparents (thank you!!) ... all this adds up to a girl that was whiny with a capital WHINE. Mostly just with me, of course, but it was/is maddening none the less.

My 'behavior modification' skills were seriously lacking ....

So, Monday begins - new week, new attitude?

At the end of the day, my mom asked me how the day went? It was surprisingly smooth - nothing special or different, but home all day. I did my thing and Ells did her thing, but we talked and spent time together and didn't run any errands or have to race anywhere (for the first time in 3 months)...

Oh - best behavior in 10+ days? I get it, thanks.

Poll: Big-kid bed

Ok ... input, please!

What age did you move your kid to their big kid bed?

How many times did they fall out?

Bed rails or no?

And, for reals, did they stop sleeping forever after you moved them???

Randomness ...

Milestone: today marks the first day that my darling little girl climbed out of her crib for the first time. THUNK! She is okay, and I knew this day was coming ... she has been testing her climbing skills in there for weeks. "I just wanted to swing, mama ..."

Reading: (do any of you read for fun anymore? I hate to tell people that I haven't read a book for pleasure since my last vacation, almost 1 year ago. Barf.) I heard about this book today on our local NPR show - Uncle Dan's Report Card: From Toddlers to Teenagers, Helping Our Children Build Strength of Character with Healthy Habits and Values Every Day (a mouthful!). I think the basic idea is that the authors have written some parenting books and do some local parenting activities in KC, then came across an uncle's report card from 1914 and were fascinated by the emphasis the school district put on the partnership between the school and family on all sorts of manners/habits/behaviors (brushing teeth, saying please and thank you, being respectful ...). They are piloting some of these activities in local schools - sounded interesting.

Skills: I read the Sesame Ellis photography blog. Rachel Devine is the photographer and she has 3 beautiful children. Plus, they live in Australia and once I saw her on House Hunters International - love that show! Today she released Click! an eBook on How To Take Gorgeous Photos of Kids. I haven't seen it yet, but think I'll get it for $19.99 - far cheaper than any photography class!

What sort of random things are you up to today? I also bought shampoo (2 big bottles to 1 big bottle of conditioner - i think I'm finally outsmarting the system), recovered a chair and organized my freezer. Do I win?

Rules of Dinner

Again, courtesy of our friends at Dinner: A Love Story - Rules of Dinner.

We aren't great with following any rules of dinner, but I like to read about how other families make it (successfully) happen. We do have family dinner most every night now, though, which was a slow but nice transition. Miss Ellen has her moments of being adventurous and trying (and liking!) new things, but certainly also turns her nose up at the "go-to" items. Grrrrr.

I look forward to the days of talking about the "highs and lows" ... the things that come out of that girl's mouth are already entertaining. Boy howdy, what the future must hold ...

Desperation, thy name is tired Mommy

I think I've alluded to the fact that our daughter has become a grade-A terrible sleeper. If I'm being objective, which is really hard, I think it was a cumulative effect of moving + busy parents + lapsing into bad habits + being 2 1/2 years old.

Nonetheless, we have slowly found ourselves in a situation where she naps maybe once or twice a week on the days she is home, stalls stalls stalls and goes to bed late, and continues to get up early. I used to be shocked when she DIDN'T nap, and now it was the exact opposite. I thought she was really going to give up her nap and I was preparing myself for a future of "quiet time".

I talked with our Parents as Teachers educator and she confirmed my feelings that Ellen really wasn't getting enough sleep. I think kids her age need like 11-13 hours of sleep total per day, and a few days a week she was getting maybe 9. Kids get sleep deprived very fast - within probably 2 days - and we were seeing the results of that. Boy howdy.

We have been pretty lucky with the tantrum situation - lots of sass and back talk and pouting - but generally we can redirect without much issue. Last week, the terrible sleep situation resulted in a crazy child at bedtime that appeared almost possessed - shaking with anger, hitting, throwing things - it was awful. And sad. I think she felt out of control and we felt out of control without knowing how to fix it.

So, back to the books for Mama. I pulled out our Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child book looking for ANY solution. I really wasn't even focused on naps, but needed to get her bedtime situation fixed. Thank you, page 325, and your Sleep Rules!

You can read the basics on Sleep Rules and Silent Return here.

This is actually very similar to the plan we used for potty training, though there is a consequence for not following the rules. Ellen responded SO well to the potty training rewards that I had high hopes (to say the least).

Prep: I made a trip to Michaels for poster board and reward trinkets / stickers. I didn't want to reward with food and totally lucked out by hitting the super clearance section of summer goodies and school goodies. I got enough rewards to fill a big box for less than $20 (art projects, chalk, bubbles, stickers, school supplies, notebooks ...). I also got some Disney princess stickers which have been a HUGE hit. We don't do much princess talk at our house, but I think they do at school and Ellen has been chatting about her princess friends. (In fact, she yelled about wanting Ariel for a long time during the tantrum from hell).

I happily talked up a group art project when Ellen saw me come home with bags of goodies. She helped me draw the 'Ellen's Sleep Rules' poster and decorated it herself. We talked through the rules and the prizes and consequences. (Follow the rules = sticker on poster, prize from box. Don't follow the rules = no sticker, no prize, no TV/iPad.)

Night #1: Bed prep as usual (books, jammies, brush teeth, into bed). I was tempted to add all these steps to the poster, but refrained. We picked a place for the poster in her room so she can see it and we talked about which princess sticker she would like to put on the poster in the morning. She repeated the rules for us and was in bed at 7:30pm, quiet by 7:35pm. This was a no-nap day, but still was the earliest she has been in bed and been quiet in FOREVER. She didn't wake at all during the night, and woke up at 6:38am, after the cow was dancing. Hallelujah!!

Nap #1: I was hopeful, yet doubtful, about how this would work for naps. We followed the exact same steps - in bed for nap about 1:45pm, up to go potty, lots of chatting in her bed, then eventually quiet at 2:45pm. I did have to go up a few times and to help her to potty, but never talked to her. I woke her at 4:30pm because I didn't want her to sleep too late, poured on the praise, and rewarded her.

She was generally a delightful child all afternoon, which is frankly a change from our recent experiences. So nice!

Night #2: I knew she wouldn't be tired for our ideal bedtime of 7:30-8:00, but she was in bed by a little after 8:00 and probably quiet by 8:35pm. Again, a huge improvement.

As an aside, this is part of the problem. When she naps, she tends to fall asleep around 2ish and would sleep until 430 or so. This clearly is too late to then be tired enough for bedtime. The solution is either to have her nap earlier, which is really a challenge, or to skip nap and do an earlier bedtime. I honestly think we are heading in that direction sooner rather than later - quiet time instead of nap, but it might make for a much more pleasant evening.

Nap #2: So-so. She did nap, but it probably took her an hour of talking before she fell asleep. I can't remember if she woke on her own or if we woke her, but she did sleep and was rewarded.

Night #3: She went to be really late, about 9:00pm, because we had dinner with friends, but she went right down and slept all night. She did wake up about 6:15am hollering, so I went in and told her she needed to be quiet until her cow was dancing. She didn't go back to sleep, but did get quiet until about 6:32am and then I went to get her and she got her rewards.

Nap #3: Best nap yet! She was probably kind of tired from a shorter night of sleep than usual, so she was in bed at about 1:30pm and asleep by 1:50pm. She slept almost 2 hours and was a pretty happy camper the rest of the day!

Night #4: Didn't go down as well as the previous nights. Along with the rest of the changes, I took all the crap out of her bed crib (probably 17 things) and make her choose only 2 items (dolls / loveys) and she gets a blanket for covers. We had to exchange some of the items back and forth, then she had to potty, but she was asleep within about 30 minutes of getting in bed.

All in all, I'm totally happy with how this has worked. I made a lot of changes all at once, which my behavioral analyst friend would not agree with, but I NEEDED things to get better. Whadda you know? They did. :)

In the book, Mark Weissbluth talks a bit about the difference between rewards and bribes, as well as the role of consequences. You can read it for yourself, but basically he says it is fine and it works. Also, that your love and kisses are not enough to change the behavior of a strong-willed toddler, so you may need back-up.

His idea is basically that your child will eventually become so proud of themselves that the rewards will kind of phase themselves out. This is exactly what happened with potty training for us, so I'm hopeful this will be the same. I have made a point to talk about how proud of Ellen I am to her, as well as our family and friends, and she gets a big smile on her face.

Awwww, still love that girl. :)

Eating with your kids

I came across two nice articles today on eating with your kids - might inspire you, or might make you feel better about how dinner takes place at your house.

Up, down, up, down. Mama - I lay down on my chair to eat. I not hungry anymore. I don't eat cooked tomatoes. Wassat? I don't like it. I want milk AND orange juice AND water. I want milk with no lid. I want a big fork. I dropped my fork. I want to sit in the middle ...

sound familiar?

From Dash and Bella - Reality

From Dinner: A Love Story - It's Not You. It's Them.